


Oblivious: Klance Slowburn

by teddy_parade



Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: Angst, Bisexual Lance (Voltron), Childhood Friends, Domestic Violence, Explicit Sexual Content, Fluff, Friends With Benefits, Friends to Lovers, Gay Keith (Voltron), Langst, M/M, Violence, klance, klangst, like eventually, slowburn
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-07-30
Updated: 2019-10-23
Packaged: 2020-07-27 05:48:47
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 4
Words: 25,197
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20040925
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/teddy_parade/pseuds/teddy_parade
Summary: Keith and Lance are childhood friends. Throughout their lives they face many challenges as they find themselves falling in love. Can they work through their issues and overcome them, or will they ultimately tear them apart?-read the alpha version of this story on my Instagram @paladin.teddy, or stick around for the edited less crap and better spelt version here :)





	1. Arc 1.1

**Author's Note:**

> This story focus' on many real world issues, some that i have dealt with personally, such as many of the mental health disorders explored, or I have experienced them second hand. This story aims to tell a brilliant love story of overcoming in a realistic expression of what these real world issues entail.
> 
> I am deeply sorry if any of these depictions are presented in ways that do not align with your own personal experience with abuse, mental health, etc this is all coming from personal or second hand experience.
> 
> Please comment and let me know what you think, I am very open to feedback and love hearing what you guys have to say, enjoy :)

Keith and Lance had known each other since they were children, it just so happened that their parents signed them up for the same local little league soccer club one year; and it just so happened that teeny tiny Lance with the big personality, just had to be friends with everyone. Even Keith. 

Especially Keith.

Equally as teeny tiny, yet shy, concentrated and way, way too hard on himself for little league soccer.  
Many times Lance witnessed Keith miss a goal and, without even acknowledging the ten he’d scored previously in that game, go into a fit of rage.

On some occasions, Keith would just push everyone away, he’d yell and hit things. As young as Lance was, he could see the intense levels of anger, frustration and embarrassment in his friend as he was sent to ‘cool down’, as their coaches liked to put it. They never even paid him another glance unless they were telling every kid that they should watch Keith, learn from him because he was an amazing player, but to never ‘act up’ like he did.

So Lance would watch his friend drop to the grass on the sideline, huffing with his thin arms wrapped around his thin legs. His eyes tearing up behind his long dark fringe. Lance saw the defeat in him, that there was something going on beneath all of that. But he was just a kid, he couldn’t have had any idea what was really going on. 

“Don’t worry about him Lance.” Their coached would say when they noticed him staring. “He has anger issues and he needs to sort them out himself. Just stay away from him, boy.” Lance never liked his little league coaches anyway; but still couldn’t help but to grip on to every single word of praise he got from them.

Because Lance needed to be like by everyone.  
Be friends with everyone.  
So he listened to his coaches; he’d just have to worry about Keith in secret. 

Lance and Keith actually live on the same street; in a row of houses that backs on to the oval where the both of them play soccer. Lance lives in a double storey house with his parents and four siblings. They always had family and friends coming and going, thriving in the cramped and hospitable lifestyle. His house was modern and renovated, everything, despite the number of occupants, was clean and tidy. 

Keith lived a few houses down, with less than half as many people in a modest one storey house. Despite the small building Keith always found it to feel cold an empty with his mother and her boyfriend always at work and his older brother Takashi always out with his friends. 

So Keith often went and explored the woods behind his house that came to an end as it joined up to the oval. He enjoyed listening to the yelling and screaming of playing kids fade into the distance as he ventured further. As the sound fizzled to nothing, so did his anger as it washed from his body. 

Keith followed his usual trail over fallen logs, moss covered rocks and tiny streams. Gracefully hurdling the obstacles until he reached his spot. His spot always changed however; it was always wherever the farthest he’d ever been, ever determined to get farther and farther away from the rest of the world. He would travel a little bit deeper every time, climb the tallest tree… and wait.

“Keith?”   
The dark haired boy sighed.  
Every time…

Keith remained silent, hoping that his red sweater was hidden well enough from the Cuban boy on the ground. Yes, Keith noticed Lance look at him every time he was angry. Keith did try his best to control it but it always got the best of him. He always messed up in the end. He just wanted to be as good as Takashi, and what made it worse was those blue eyes on him every time. 

Lance always came up and talked to him, however Keith was always too shy to say anything back. If he saw Lance walking to his house to ask if he wanted to kick around a ball, he would go and hide in the woods. 

And yes, Keith noticed Lance follow him into the woods every time. And he hid, every time; it had become a sort of unfortunate routine for the two boys. And it wasn’t that Keith didn’t want to be Lance’s friend. In reality, he wanted nothing more. He always saw Lance and his friends at school and wanted so badly to join them. But Lance would just never get it. There was no way he could understand was Keith’s life was like. He would find the truth, and by extension Keith, weird, sad, and boring. 

So Keith hid, every time.

*** 

Keith hadn’t been to school for a week and no one in his family had noticed. His brother, who was in middle school now, had grown distant from him. Even though they were four years apart they’d always been really close. He’d quit soccer and was never home. Keith could tell his brother was avoiding something. His mother and her boyfriend worked all the time, so even though he was little, Keith still managed to delete the voicemail from their landline phone before anyone had found out. 

Keith was by no means a bad kid. He got good grades and usually attend class everyday; so Keith assumed that no one would even begin to think that this was something he would do. He spent more and more time in the woods travelling deeper, until one day he found a hill that was too steep for him to climb down. It was near a river that was far wider than any other he’d come across and all of the surrounding rocks were really slippery. 

He’s gone to the river everyday that week, often losing track of time while he stared into the rippling water. This habit had ultimately caused him to almost be late to his family's compulsory Friday night dinner that had been instigated by his mother in the hopes that Keith and Takashi would bond with her boyfriend, Sendak. She hadn’t dated anyone since Keith's dad had died and it proved really hard for him to adjust to. 

That particular night when Keith had sat down opposite Takashi, he noticed his brother looking anywhere but at his family, instead opting to stare out of the window behind Keith’s head, not even touching his food. Keith’s attention was then, however draw by Sendak who grunted as he bumped past Keith’s chair to get to his own. 

“Look what you’ve done!” He snapped suddenly, his eyes narrowed on the small boy, “You’ve tracked dirt through the house, all over the floor!” he scolded. He huffed and rolled his eyes before turning to his food. Keith continued to stare at the man, who hadn’t even thanked Keith’s mum for making dinner like his dad had always done when he was alive. 

Keith mumbled an apology, looking at the floor from him to the back door. He felt really bad about his mistake and could feel himself begin to tear up and his throat felt like it was closing. He tried to push the feeling down. He always felt like this when Sendak yelled, whether it was at him, at Takashi, or even his mother. 

He always feared that it would escalate. He would never let his mother know, but he saw when Sendak hit her. Or that he’d seen the one time that Takashi had tried to step in and had been shoved into a wall. Keith decided that he would clean up the mess as soon as dinner was over. 

As everyone began to eat in dead silence, Keith noticed that his brother was still only picking at his food. Towards the end of the meal, he took a deep breath and cleared his throat.   
“Um… Everyone. There is something that I need to tell you. Everyone, even Sendak, gave their instant attention to the twelve year old; whom upon receiving it immediately sank back into his chair. 

“What is it sweetheart? Krolia asked from the end of the table.   
“Well, I’ve been thinking for a while.” Takashi began, placing down his fork as he placed his next words together very carefully. “Well I’ve decided… Or more that I’ve figured out that… I, uh…” Takashi trailed off, clearly very nervous. Keith could see him subconsciously tug on the bottom of the sleeve of his hoodie, eyes searching as his brain found the courage to make his announcement. 

“I’m.. uh, I have a boyfriend. Adam… from school. I’m gay.” 

The table went quiet, Krolia put down her cutlery and wiped her face with her napkin, Keith just stared at his older brother. Keith wanted to congratulate his brother, he didn't even know that boys could have boyfriends. But he knew that right now he didn’t want to be the first to speak. 

The air hung thick with tension over the room as all eyes went to Sendak.

“Get out.” The man grumbled.   
“Wh- what?” Takashi looked terrified, his skin went pale and his eyes were blown wide. Keith had to look away, all of the memories of getting the news of his dad dying washed over him. That was the last time he'd seen his big brother look like that.

“I said,” Keith could see Sendak’s eye twitch. “GET OUT!” he roared, pushing himself out of his chair and leaning over the table with a mighty bang of his fists on the old wood. Taksahi jumped to his feet, darting across the room, shocked and evidently scared. 

“I… um, mum?” he pleaded with her in an attempt to get any kind of response out of her. But she remained still, eyes on her plate and hands tensed on her thighs.   
“OUT! GET OUT!” Sendak spat, pointing towards the door. He began to make his way over to Takashi around the table. 

The boy was lucky enough to beat him down the hallway, trying to get to the front door with tears streaming down his face, blurring his vision. He swung the door open and ran into the front garden. The setting sun made it really hard for Keith to see him beyond this point as he stood helpless at the other end of the hallway.   
“WE DON’T TOLERATE THAT KIND OF BEHAVIOUR HERE!” Keith could still hear Sendak loud and clear. “NOT IN MY HOUSE!” with that the brute of a man slammed the door shut. 

‘My house.’ the words echoed in Keith’s mind. The part that stuck with him most was that unfortunately, it had become true. Sure, his name wasn’t on the papers and he'd only lived with them for a few months, but Sendak had certainly made the house his. 

Keith’s blood went cold as he noticed Sendak storm back towards his direction, the small boy jumped out of the way and back into his seat. As he got to where Keith was he stopped, causing Keith to freeze. Sendak, seeing Keith’s scared expression, smirked as he leaned over him with a stern scowl.

“This is what fags like him deserve.” 

Sendak stormed off to the lounge room, immediately turning up the volume obnoxiously high, drowning out tension of the room under layers of football commentary and gameplay. Keith shifted his eyes from the dark entryway into said lounge room and his mother, hoping that this meant Sendak wouldn’t be able to hear any sort of conversation from the kitchen. 

Keith slowly crept back over to his mother, he waited at her side for her to speak first; however at her continued stillness, he tapped the woman’s shoulder.   
“Mum? Where is Kash going to go if he can’t stay here?” He stood on his toes in order to speak quietly to her. He vaguely remembered a game he used to play with his mother. He’d go up to her and tell her he had a secret to tell her, only to them whisper into her ear that he loved her. She’d always smile brightly and hugged him tight. This time, however, he got no such response. 

Keith sunk back to the floor defeated at her maintained stoic composure.  
“Mum?” He pushed on her shoulder lightly. As of a sudden her shoulders dropped, her body doubling over as she caught her elbows on the table. Krolia, buried her head in her hands, shutting her eyes tight as she let the stream of silent tears fall from her cheeks onto the abandoned dinner that was now going cold. 

Seeing his mother cry made the eight year old very upset also. He began to cry with her, sniffling as he clung tightly onto one of her arms. He didn't really understand what had happened. Where his brother had gone or why they were crying - but Keith saw his mother upset and he himself felt upset, so crying felt like the best option. He stayed quiet in his lamenting, mirroring his mother’s efforts, thinking about what Sendak’s response to their emotion would be. These thoughts internalised, manifesting into that bad feeling again, the one he always got around his mother’s boyfriend. His throat felt like it was closing and it became increasingly hard to hear everything around him. 

So Keith did what he always did when he had a problem, he ran. Sprinting from the scene, Keith slammed the back screen door behind him, not able to think as far a consequences concerning any of his actions. He exited the back gate and didn't stop running until he was deep into the woods with equal haste. Tears continued to steam down his face in the dark night. 

He ran as fast as his little legs could take him, hurtling logs and rocks, realising all too late that he’d never been in the woods on his own at night. Not since his Dad was still alive and had taken he and Takashi camping. He screeched to a halt, panting loudly as he searched around frantically in the dark. He cried harder as he tried to look back in the direction that he'd come from. Nothing but darkness as the forest that once comforted him, contorted into the scariest of places containing the most dangerous of lurking monsters. 

Keith continued down the trail, haphazardly, stumbling in the dark. If he was where he thought he was, he should be at the large stream soon, more so of a river than a stream. He attempted to navigate his path based on the sheer amount of times he'd been in the woods during the day, however situationally less concerned with being careful as he usually might be. In a panicked run, Keith felt his favourite red sweater tear on a branch, as he swung his head back to see the branch he felt his foot slide forward from underneath him, losing his balance on the slippery rocks.

Stumbling forward, Keith thought about how angry Sendak would be when he saw the tear. He'd want to throw out the jumper; but it was the last thing his Dad had ever given him. Thoughts about him getting in trouble finally began to circulate in the eight year old’s brain, filling him with so much dread that he didn’t even notice the ground getting softer, his hand-me-down converse sinking in the dirt around the river bed.

Lifting his foot in the sludge, Keith lost his balance once more, this time unable to catch himself. He screamed as he felt himself falling, wind catching his flailing arms as he failed to see how far away the ground was. With a thud, Keith landed in the mud, rolling himself over shortly after hitting the ground. With his only view being the stars above him, Keith was left with nothing to do but just lay there and cry. 

Keith imagined the police finding him there, that was if anyone issued a warrant to look for him. He imagined them bringing him home, muddy and bruised to Sendak and his mother. He imagined something inhumane finding him first, debating which option scared him more.

Keith was still on the floor for several minutes later when he noticed light bouncing off of the trees around him. The light got brighter and brighter as well as more focused until it was hitting the water right beside Keith’s head. He tried to stay as still as he could, mind racing about who or what it might be. Perhaps Takashi had come to look for him, or was hiding in here too, but had been smart enough to bring a torch. 

The young boy mentally scolded himself; he was so stupid for not bringing anything with him. Now he was lost and angry and had failed yet again to face his own problems. Now someone, a stranger perhaps, had found him. Distinct footsteps could be heard, multiple pairs even. They got closer and closer the sound of crunching leaves and snapping twigs turned into shoes sludging through mud. 

“Keith?” A soft voice spoke. 

On that night, Keith had never been happier that lance had followed him into the woods. 

***

Keith sat up slowly, shielding his face from the bright torchlight with his hand. Lance frown as Keith’s small silhouette sat alone, hunched and muddy in the river bed. The tide was coming in ever so slowly, rising enough to make Keith”s clothes wet. 

“What are you doing out here, Keith?” Lance questioned, stepping forward in front of the torch light. It was only then that Keith noticed the brunette wasn’t the one holding the tool, but one of his older brothers; Marco, Keith was quite sure. He was sixteen and Keith always saw him waiting in their elementary school car park ready to drive Lance home. Sometimes he even offered Keith lifts home when they saw him walking, but Keith always refused. 

“Yeah I was out on the oval with Lance, teaching him some new tricks for soccer to show you next week when the field lights turned off. We were about to go inside when we heard you scream. Are you okay?” Marco explained to Keith slowly, approaching him cautiously. The teen, placed the large camping torch on a rock near him as he knelt down to meet the boy on the ground.

Lance eagerly picked up the torch in both hands and dashed forwards quickly to stand next to his older brother. Marco’s face was dripping with concern as he checked over Keith who could only stare back at him. He was to scared to tell on Sendak, as much as he wanted to. He was too worried about the kind of retribution involved for opening his mouth. 

Deciding that Keith wasn’t going to say anything, Marco looked to the dirty ground, searching for what to say next. He couldn't force the kid to speak but he also couldn't leave him there.

“Do you want me to walk you home.” He offered gently. However at his sentiment Keith’s head shot up, wide eyes meeting Marco’s for the first time. Keith did the last thing that Marco expected, he began trembling all over, shaking his head with such vigour that the teen was worried he would give himself whiplash. 

“Hey, hey, it’s okay.” he soothed, placing a gentle hand on Keith’s shoulder, only for the raven haired boy to flinch away.   
“Well you can’t stay here.” Marco continued. “Would you like to come to our house. I’m sure out Mama won’t mind, one of Lance’s friends staying the night.” 

Lance, whom Keith had not forgotten was there as he excitedly pointed the large torch at things around them, quickly whipped his body around, bringing the torch wit him to point directly at his brother at the mention of Keith being addressed as he friend. In his haste he accidentally shone the light directly into Keith’s eyes who darted his head into his hands. 

“Sorry.” Lance called out in the night, shining the light back at the ground.   
“What do you say?” Marco asked again, trying desperately to get an answer from Keith without pushing him too far.  
“Yeah Keith, we can have a sleepover.” Lance called excitedly behind him.

Keith thought about the offer seriously. He’d never really talked to Lance before then. Not from lack of trying on Lance’s part however, but due to Keith’s persistent avoidance. But in that moment, anything seemed better than going back home. Keith simply nodded slightly, but it was enough to draw a smile from Marco, who pushed himself to stand from his knee, offering out a hand to Keith to help him up out of the mud as well.

As soon as Keith was standing, Lance quickly handed the torch back to Marco and linked his arm around Keith’s. He carefully lead Keith through the trees and natural obstacles behind the guidance of his older brother.


	2. Arc 1.2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Keith gets to know his new friend while you, dear reader get to know Keith and his life a little more.

When the three boys entered through the back of the McClain house, Keith was mesmerised. There were five other people sitting on the couch watching TV aside from him, Lance and Marco but what really got to Keith was the atmosphere he’d felt as soon as he’d crossed over the threshold of the back door. It was just so alive and warm; Something Keith hadn’t felt in his house since-

“Hey Lance, do you want to take Keith up to your room and get him some dry clothes to change into. I can go talk to Mama.” Marco said to Lance.

“Oh, yeah!” Lance replied quickly, grabbing Keith’s hand and before the smaller boy had any time to react, he found himself being pulled up a flight of floor-boarded stairs. 

Once in Lance’s room, the Cuban excitedly told Keith to stay still while he got clean pyjamas and a towel for him to dry off with. Lance then sped out of his room, grabbing his door frame as he swung around it into the hallway and out of sight. While Lance was out of the room, Keith looked around at the poster covered baby blue walls filled with planet charts and famous astronauts and historical space expeditions. Lance even had those stick on glow in the dark stars on his roof that Keith used to have before Sendak said it would wreck the paint on the roof and had made Takashi scrape them off. 

Having taken his muddy converse and drenched socks off outside, Keith could feel the soft and warm carpet between his toes, a complete contrast to the worn floorboards in his own room. For the first time that night, Keith found himself able to relax, the tension slowly fading from his shoulders as his arms relaxed by his sides and he noticed that his fists were no longer clenched. Lance’s room was awesome!

Lance’s mother found Keith right as Lance was handing him everything he needed to shower. She looked slightly saddened upon seeing the small boy, something Keith had seen many times over the past few years. From teachers, other mothers at soccer, you name it. It was a look of pity… Keith hated pity. But something about the way that Mrs McClain's mouth tilted up ever so slightly, generating the warmest smile filling Keith’s stomach with the most inviting feeling. Keith found himself wanting to hug the woman.

“Hey Sweetheart.” She said softly, kneeling down to his level, something only his mother did, “Marco told me you want to sleep over. You can get nice and dry, but then I want to ask you something, okay?” She maintained her smile as she spoke. Lines appeared next to her eyes as she did so, another thing that reminded him of his mother. It had been a while since he’d seen her smile, however. Mrs McClain must have sensed a shift in Keith as he patted his shoulder lightly. 

“But go get warm first, sweetie.”

Keith showered quickly, using the soap from the bottle shaped like a rocket ship. It smelt like strawberries and Lance had told him it was the one he should use. Lance had been running around non-stop since Keith had gotten there so it was nice for him to be alone again. Sometimes Keith hated being alone, but right now, anything outside of the small bathroom was an alien planet to Keith. 

The small boy relaxed a little more under the hot water after spending a whole five minutes figuring out how to get the hot water to come out of the shower head. He felt bad about taking so long and hastily went about pumping the soap into his hand to wash himself free of the mud.  
The strong scent of strawberries instantly hit Keith’s nose, causing him to smile.

He finished up in a matter of minutes, pulling on the t-shirt he’d been given by Lance and some NASA pyjama bottoms. They were both a bit too big for him but they were very soft and warm, Keith liked those pyjamas. He walked back into Lance’s bedroom expecting to find Lance still running around finding things to show him; but instead he found only Mrs McClain sitting on the single bed. 

“Come sit down honey.” she said patting the spot next to her. Keith cautiously took a step closer to her, clutching his dirty clothes tightly in his hands. He decided to remain standing on the soft carpet; Lance’s mother didn’t coax him any further. 

“Keith, I need you to tell me why you were out in the woods alone at night.” Her question was blunt but her tone remained kind. Keith was hesitant to answer at first, staring at her as he chewed down on his bottom lip, hoping that she could just read his mind or something instead.

The woman sighed and Keith felt bad thinking he’d disappointed her. Would he have to leave?

“Did your parents have a fight?” She asked. “Were you at home alone and get scared?” She pressed a little, yet Keith remained silent. “Is anyone hurt?” She spoke after a moment, sternly but still gentle. 

This got to Keith and he dropped his head to the floor. Mrs McClain stood up, placing a hand on his shoulder. Keith noticed the large wedding ring on her finger. Keith’s own mother had one like that from his father, but had placed it in a secret box under her bed. Keith knew that she didn't want Sendak to find it.  
“It’s okay honey. Let me take your clothes, I’ll wash them and you can get a good night's sleep.”

Mrs McClain smiled at Keith before her eyes drifted knowingly to behind the door frame, mouth twisting into an unimpressed smirk.  
“You too, Lance. You’ve both got school tomorrow.”

Keith turned to see Lance’s eyes peering out from the side of the door, he broke into excited giggles as he ran into his bedroom. He ran past his mother to jump on his bed as she stood to walk, stopping at the entry. She flicked off the lights and shut the door behind her just as Lance flicked on his Saturn shaped night light, clearly a routine. 

“This is so exciting!” Lance exclaimed, picking up the blankets and shuffling to get under them. “I’ve never had a sleepover with a friend before.” He looked, wide eyed over to the boy still standing awkwardly in the centre of the room. 

Keith rolled his eyes, crossing his arms over his stomach.   
“We aren’t friends, Lance.” He told the brunette.   
“Sure we are.” Lance chirped. “We play soccer together, we go to the same school.” He began to list.  
“But we never talk to each other; not until tonight.” Keith reminded.   
“Well I talked to you. You’re just my shy friend.”

Keith looked warily at Lance but refrained from saying anything. Lance huffed still smiling, clearly taking the lack of rejection as affirmation.   
“Come on!” he shouted, vigorously patting the spot next to him on the single bed. “We can play my D.S! I have Pokémon. Everyone likes Pokémon!”

Keith smiled tiredly at his apparent new friend, finally climbing up onto the bed.   
“I do like Pokémon.” Keith mumbled. “But maybe tomorrow. I kinda just want to go to sleep.” He assumed that Lance would be the type to whine, making him stay up anyway, but Lance just ginned at Keith. 

“Okay. Big day being an explorer, aye?” Lance laughed to himself. Keith grinned the the funny voice Lance had put on, drooping eyes weighing down on him.  
The pair laid down on the two pillows that had been squashed next to each other on the single. Keith shut his eyes as soon as he was comfortable and the room was finally silent.

However, as he went about blocking out the events of the day, he couldn’t help but feel the eyes on him. Keith opened his own to see Lance giddily staring straight back at him.   
Suddenly uncomfortable, Keith mumbled a goodnight before rolling over to face away from Lance, shutting his eyes once more. 

Keith began to drift off again, not another word uttered; until he was startled by small fingers in his hair. Keith froze.

“Lance?”  
“Yeah?”  
“Whatcha doing?” His voice was small as he spoke slowly in the dimly lit room.  
“Your hair is really soft now that it is dry. I like playing with people's hair. Especially my Mama’s.” He explained just as gently. 

Keith wanted to tell Lance to stop but he couldn’t help but to enjoy the feeling of fingers lightly tugging at his hair; missing any sort of affection from anyone in the longest time. He leaned into Lance’s touch, causing him to think of Takashi and where he might be. How his older brother used to play with his hair when Keith got sad. But Takashi hadn’t been around to do that in ages, in fact, he’d barely been at home much in the recent weeks. Only now, keith knew why.

“Is this okay?” Lance asked eventually, as if he hadn’t already started the action.  
“Yeah.” Keith could only whisper, his knuckles gripped around the blanket tightly, cuddling it up over his mouth. 

The room went silent again. Lance running his fingers through the smaller boys untidy mullet. Keith tried to fall asleep again through the nice sensation but his heart was still hurting and his mind perpetually racing. He remained as still as he could, coaxing himself not to cry.

“You seem sad.” A small voice sounded from behind him. Lance seemed to have calmed down completely since playing with Keith’s hair. Keith didn’t respond to him, he didn’t really know how to. He was indeed very sad; he just didn’t know how to admit it. 

“Do you need a hug? I like giving hugs to my friends.” Lance asked. Keith thought about it for a moment, he hadn’t had a hug in what felt like forever.  
“Mmkay...” He mumbled.  
“Come here.” Lance whispered and Keith rolled over in his spot on the bed, accidentally moving closer to the other boy in the process, ending up right against him. 

Lance simply threw a lazy arm around Keith and pulled him in. Keith felt awkward in the hug as he found it to be so familiar yet so unfamiliar at the same time. He’d never really had friends and he didn’t know if this was just what friends did. He did notice, however, how relaxed Lance looked as his eyes fluttered shut. 

“Is this what friends do?” Keith asked.  
“All the time.” The other boy said. Keith had both of his arms tucked up against his chest as the blanket and Lance’s arm cover his body. He felt so comfortable and admittedly very safe. In no time at all he drifted off to sleep, thinking about how he might just like having friends. 

Keith woke to a light chuckle and a knock at the door. He blinked his eyes open a few times to adjust to the light entering the room from the window. For a moment all he could feel was a weight on him that he didn’t usually feel when waking up and all he could see where the stars on his roof that he knew he wasn’t allowed to have. 

‘Right, I’m at Lance’s house.’ 

Keith turned his head to face the other boy who was still trying to wake up. He still had his arm around Keith after pulling him close to his chest all night. Lance was such a great friend, Keith thought. He cared about him so much even though they had never played together before. Keith felt a twist in his tummy, feeling bad for not giving Lance a chance sooner. 

Soon enough Lance’s eyes drifted over to the other boy, an ear to ear smile taking over his face.   
“Morning Keithy!” He chirped, shedding the grogginess instantly.   
“Good morning.” Keith whispered, having not found his voice yet and choosing to ignore the nickname for the moment. His dad was the only one who called him that. His real dad. He’d tell Lance to stop if he did it again.

“Are you feeling less sad now?” Lance moved his other hand up to lightly poke at Keith’s cheek. Keith just hummed in confirmation, seemingly enough for Lance.   
“It’s because my cuddles are the best! They can cheer anyone up.” For the first time since entering the McClain’s house, Keith couldn’t help but to let out a small laugh. His new friend was really dorky, but in the fun kind of way.

Keith sat up, swinging his legs off the side of the bed to see the clothes he’d been wearing the night before clean and folded neatly on Lance’s desk. He let his feet hang, toes only just touching the soft carpet. Keith started to get off the bed when Mrs McClain appeared at the door again. 

“Morning boys.” he sang, turning to address Keith. “I washed your clothes so that you can wear them to school today. Or if you’d like we can find some of Lance’s for you to borrow. Keith looked across to where his own clothes sat; his favourite red sweatshirt that had secretly been concealing a shirt his dad had gotten him from a rock concert when he was little, underneath. Keith didn’t want his mum’s boyfriend to take it away from him, so he always hid it. 

“It’s okay.” He answered. “I’ll wear these. Thank you for washing them.” Keith offered the woman a small smile which she returned warmly before exiting down the hall again. The boys got dressed quickly. Lance’s other older brother Luis then instructed Lance on where the new toothbrushes they kept for guests were kept so that Keith could brush his teeth after breakfast.

At these words, a delightful smell from the level below wafted into Keith’s nose. It smelt like the amazing pancakes his mum used to make before Sendal stopped her, worried about himself gaining weight.

Breakfast at the McClain’s house turned out to be very different from breakfast at his own home. For starters, seven people, eight including Keith, sat down around a large table, passing bowls and pouring drinks of juice or coffee for each other. Everything had a mouthwatering smell and everything had a delicious topping. 

Keith wondered as he knocked elbows with Lance, if their breakfasts were always this crowded, or if it was just cramped because he was there. He really appreciated that Mr McClain had moved and set up a collapsible chair from the garage so that Keith could join. It didn’t match everyone else's but then again, neither did he. Keith was different from the McClain’s but somehow they made him feel like he wasn’t. 

Keith’s own family ate breakfast in silence, and rarely ever together. His mother made everyone breakfast before grabbing a granola bar and a travel mug of coffee and heading off to work. Sendak ate quickly and loudly which more often than not put Keith off his food. Takashi rarely even made it to the table. Keith would have to scrape his brother’s full bowl of oats or cereal or plate of untouched toast into the bin, waking him up with just enough time to get ready and go most mornings. 

But here the McClain’s asked him questions. They went around the table asking each member what their day would consist of, including both parents and definitely not excluding Keith. However Keith didn’t know what his day would consist of. When it got to Lance he talked all about how Marco would take himself and two of his friends to meet up at one of their houses and they would play video games. Then they would have pizza for dinner, as they did this every Friday. 

As soon as Lance had finished babbling on, all eyes were on Keith.   
“Uhhhh.” he thought for a moment what to say. With his mouth still open he brought up one hand to play with his loose tooth while he thought. 

“Wow! You have a loose tooth!” Lance interrupted. Keith felt a massive pressure lift as the subject was changed.   
“Um, yeah.” He replied sheepishly.  
“That’s so cool! I haven’t lost any yet!” Lance continued to shout. Keith was slowly finding out that his new friend had no volume awareness, but as long as it meant no one was looking at Keith, he didn’t mind. 

“Oh really? I think I’ve lost like four. When they were wobbly my dad used to pull them out because he-” Keith cut himself off. The realisation of what he was talking about hit him and he began to tear up. He hadn’t talked about his dad out loud since he died and it caused Keith to think about all of the fun things they did together. It was painful.  
“You get to have a visit from the tooth fairy!” Lance was still yelling.

Sensing the vibe of the conversation, the rest of the McClain’s seemed to jump at the mention of the fairy, faced brightening, all nodding with enthusiasm at their youngest’s statement.   
“Yeah Keith, you’ll get some money for sweets! How exciting.” Lance’s oldest sister Veronica, as Keith had learned, enthused. 

“Oh, I don’t get the tooth fairy at my house. My mummy’s boyfriend said that she doesn’t want my teeth.” He explained, voice shrinking as he watched every member of the McClain family drop their happy expressions. Keith chewed on his bottom lip embarrassed, he’d done that. 

Any hope of restoring the conversation proved futile after that. Keith continued to entertain the thought that it was all his doing. He could feel the angry feeling rising in his stomach but he pushed it back down as far as he could as to not ruin the morning any more. 

It was silent until Mrs McClain cut in, standing and clapping her hands together.   
“Well it’s time to leave for school. Keith, sweetie, I called your mama last night to let her know that you were here. Her number was with the soccer club.” She explained to him, before sending all of the children off to do their teeth. 

Mrs McClain was Vice President of their local soccer club, Keith didn’t even know she could get everyone’s numbers. It made him feel better that his mum wouldn’t be worried about him. But as he went to walk back down the stairs to the car he grew terrified that Sendak knew where he was, that the man would come and get him. It was as if Mrs McClain had read his mind, more likely his face as she approached him before he left the house. 

“I had a lovely chat with your mama, sweetheart. There is nothing to worry about.” The woman beamed before announcing to the whole house. “Alright family, in the car, we have to shift it if we want to get everyone to school on time.” 

Keith liked how the McClain’s made him feel welcomed. Calling them all ‘family’ not ‘family and Keith’. She tried her best to calm his worries; but there was no way she could have known what his worries were. He knew his mum wouldn’t have told her. But he was thankful that she had tried. 

***  
~the previous night~

Krolia slid her back down the wall, landline phone clutched to her chest. She hung her head as she attempted to hold everything she was feeling inside. She felt like a failure of a mother. In the span of an hour both of her children had been driven out of her house by her boyfriend. Keith, her baby… He’d always had trouble making friends but even he managed to do so in order to get away from the situation. Her breathing became uneven and she began to whimper as she thought of Takashi.

She hadn’t been there for him through his struggles, she wasn’t even aware that he had any. What kind of mother doesn't even notice how much time he had spent avoiding the house. She was always at work, never realising how horrible a place their home must have been for them. She let that man throw out her child when he needed her support the most and now she didn’t even know where he was. 

She could hear the beeping of the phone over dead air on her chest, signifying that Mrs McClain had hung up. She was alone. She no longer had any friends, but was instead left with a minimum wage job where no one talked to her, a second job on weekends and a boyfriend who abused her and her family. What had she become. She had everything only two years ago. The best life with the best family. 

That one fateful night had taken everything away from her. The love of her life, her carefree days and had simultaneously sent every foundation she had built crashing to the ground. She didn’t love Sendak, and she never would. There was a time where she thought she did, or at least could, but now she knew that she was just fooling herself. But she needed him. Life was so easy before her husband died that she was able to quit her job to look after her children. She would grow things in the backyard and experiment with flavours seeing what would go best with whatever her husband brought home. Life was an adventure for her, which she loved to instil into her family. She helped out at the soccer club and she had a flourishing social circle. 

Now she had no time, no career. She relied on Sendak for everything. Paying the bills down to paying for putting her kids through school. He practically owned her an he would never let her forget that. This man had come in and ripped the shiny exterior off as soon as he was in the door. He had taken everything that was once hers and had claimed it as his right to treat her children any way he pleased, because without him, they’d have nothing.

Perhaps she’d have her dignity, Krolia often thought this to herself. But at what cost? The lives of the two people she loved most in the world? The loss of her very being was worth giving up for Takashi and Keith. 

She had always seen the McClain’s at soccer, they always seemed so put together and so happy. They had been close once…

They were everything she wanted to be as a family and everything that she once had. How was it that they were just so willing and able to take her child in for a night with no notice whatsoever? How could they so easily rearrange a morning to accommodate for Keith without it being a hassle?

Asking Sendak to count one more person in to anything at anytime would cause for absolute rage and threats to leave her. She knew he never would, through. No one else would have him, and why would he want to when he basically controlled the lives of everyone under that roof. It was a sad reality, She needed him, and he needed her. But Krolia would never love Sendak. Not like she loved Ken. 

~present: midday~

Rosa had just finished updating her blog: the latest recipes that can be dressed up or dressed down to suit the pickiest of eaters or the fanciest of guests all in one meal. It was her passion, but a lot of work. Finally done for the day, she began to tidy around the house. The entire family would do a big clean on Saturday after soccer, so going around and straightening things only took about half an hour. 

When she got to her youngest son’s bedroom she could already feel the taste of wine and cheese on her lips and the newly recorded episode of Real Housewives screaming at her to be watched. Lance was such a good kid, always keeping his room clean. She knew she would be done in thirty seconds flat. 

As she entered the room, the biggest smile spread across her face at the sight: two neatly folded pairs of pyjamas on his made bed; the ones he had worn and the ones he had lent to that little boy, Keith. Lance was always doing whatever he could to get her attention, and Rosa loved how he chose the most subtle ways to do it. 

He’d ask his older siblings to take him into the forest to pick flowers for her, even if at least once a week she found a handful of weeds on her bedside table propped up in a cup full of water. He’d ask them to help him bake things to be like his mama; she still had every single friendship bracelet he’d ever made her in a box under her bed. There had to be at least thirty. 

He was the sweetest boy, so willing and wanting of friends. So kind to open his home to the little boy from soccer who never really talked and who always looked frightened. Rosa worried about Keith. At first, she hadn’t even thought for a second that his home life could be in any way compromising. She used to be friends with his mother Krolia when she was only the soccer club committee, they always had Keith and Lance play together as toddlers, talking about how they would start school as best friends. However, after her husband died in that fire… he dew back. She quit the committee and was to busy with her new job to socialise anymore. 

Rosa always assumed that that was life. She found a new man relatively quickly, a little more than half a year. Rosa thought Krolia’s life was back in order. Perhaps they weren’t.

She knew she had no right to pry, but she felt she needed to do something to help Keith. At least for that day. She saw something in his face during breakfast when Lance talked about his play date, when he was asked about his own day. She wasn’t even sure if the boy knew what his day would look like. She had to do something. 

...brrrr…brr…

“Hello?” 

“Hi Colleen, it’s Rosa.”

“Oh, hello hun, how are you?”

“Good, good. There was just something I wanted to ask you.”

“Go ahead.”

Rosa pondered what to say for a moment. Her request was simple but she worried her friend would inquire further into it. She would undoubtedly illuminate her friend to her theories later, but without a solid and plausible theory, and without lead, she wouldn’t begin something she couldn't put an end to. 

“Well there's this boy Lance has been playing with recently. He’s rather quiet and I don’t think he has any other friends. Would it be alright if we included him in to the Friday night routine?”

“Oh of course, the more the merrier.” Colleen Holt responded through the phone. “Who is he? Does he play soccer with Lance and Katie?”

“Yes he does, actually. Keith Kogane, the real little one who scores a lot of goals.” 

Rosa waited for Colleen’s response. When not receiving the next line of usual conversation after around fifteen seconds, she grew worried about the sudden stiff air over the phone line. 

“Colleen?” she asked again.

“Oh yes,” the woman’s voice sounded again, suddenly. “Of course he can.” Colleen made a tutting noise through the phone, Rosa could imagine her friend shaking her head at herself. 

“It’s just…” she trailed off. Rosa was worried that she would say something was wrong with the little boy in question, something she hadn’t picked up on… Keith just seemed so polite. 

“Well I hate to gossip is all but…” Colleen took a breath. “His older brother, Takashi, you know him?” 

“Yes, he’s in Veronica’s year at school.” 

“Well he’s staying at mine currently.”

“Oh how nice, double play date!” she sang through the phone though her teeth were gritted. Hoping that that was all but suspecting that it definitely wasn’t.

“Not exactly.” The two women let out a sigh in unison. “You see, Takashi is staying at my house for an... undetermined amount of time.” She went on to explain. “Could you imagine, twelve years old, kicked out of his own home by his mother’s boyfriend…” she exclaimed her disbelief more to herself than to Rosa.

“Kicked out!” Rosa was dumbfounded, looking around to make sure none of her family members were home yet to hear her sudden shout. “For what?” Takashi is such a nice boy.”

“Well the poor kid didn’t want to talk about it much, I don’t blame him really. I’ve met him and his boyfriend multiple times, both friends of Matthew’s. Not once did I suspect that his parents didn’t know he was gay.”

Rosa was shocked to sat the least. As long as she’d known Krolia, she’d always been an open minded free spirit full of passion and soul and love. There was a girl in their friend group in high school who was a lesbian, for crying out loud, and Krolia never even did as much as bat an eyelash about it. It all seemed so wrong. Krolia used to give muffins to Ronnie, because she knew that she was in the same year as her son. Ronnie said she liked the interesting flavours so Krolia gave her the recipe. She was so kind, there was no way that this was possibly her doing. 

“Did… did Krolia do it-”

“Oh goodness, no!” Colleen corrected instantly. “It was that boarish man she is seeing. My, her last husband was a dream, trust Krolia to marry Ken, the most gorgeous and kind hearted guy in our school… just for a few short years later to wind up with what she has now. The poor thing could do so much better…” she stopped herself from rambling. Rosa, who’d mindlessly picked up a pen to doodle while talking on a piece of paper, tapped the the notepad inquisitively. Perhaps Sendak was the reason that Keith had been in the woods the night before after all. He hadn’t grown up with them, moved shortly after Ken’s death. He was hardly illustrious, kept to himself. Could this be a lead… what Rosa needed to help her old friend. 

“I don’t know how she could let him do that to her child. But he is welcome here as long as he needs us.” Colleen assured Rosa.

“We should talk to her.” The cuban woman replied immediately. “Not today , maybe at soccer, not to pry or anything. We could just let her know that she has friends that are still there for her.   
“Sounds like a plan.” Colleen sounded cheery yet determined. “Well, I will see you tonight, then will I?”

“See you then, Col, bye.”

Rosa happily wrote down a reminder to pay Marco his allowance to drive Lance to the Holt’s that night, hesitating just as she began to write down Keith’s name also. Her eyes drifted back to the top of the paper currently flipped open on the note pad. Krolia’s number was there from when she got it at from the soccer club. She needed to ring first, hoping that Keith would be given permission to attend. 

“Hello?” 

“Hi, Krolia, it me again, Rosa?”

“Oh hi, sorry you’ve just reached me at a bad time. Work break just ended, you know how it is? Rosa heard a small laugh through the phone. It sounded in genuine but Rosa blamed it on her mind wanting desperately to find something wrong. 

“Not a problem, I’m just calling to let you know that Keith has been invited to a playdate at the Holt’s this afternoon. My son Marco is taking everyone so you don’t need to worry about a lift. Is that okay?” She asked.

“Oh that’s wonderful. I’m so glad that Keith is making more friends.” Krolia sounded genuinely delighted. 

“Excellent. I’ll let you go now but I will text you the address.”

“Great. Well I’ll see you later then.” Krolia’s voice sounded rushed. Rosa heart rate picked up, debating with herself whether or not to tell her - Oh she had to.

“Krolia?”

“Yes?” 

“I just thought I should let you know… Takashi is there. He is staying with Matthew…”

Rosa heard Krolia gasp. She listened to the static for a few seconds. She’d almost assumed that the line had gone dead, not being able to hear anything on the other side. She was about to hang up when she heard, in the tiniest whisper.

“Thank you.”

***

Keith climbed out of the backseat of the McClain’s car. He’d offered to sit in the middle to stop Lance and his older sister Rachel from fighting over who had to sit there. 

As soon as they were all out Rachel, who was two years older than they were, skipped off to find her friends. She was in the fourth grade and she got to be in a classroom on the second floor of the school. 

Keith and Lance walked past where the busses unloaded, where Keith usually was. Where he was supposed to be. Lance grabbed him to pull Keith along, seeing him linger there at the sight. 

“Come on, I want you to meet my friends.”

Lance pulled Keith along to the front door of the school, hand still around his wrist. He pushed through the crowd of kids both older and younger, playing before class. Keith liked to avoid this part of the school, usually going around to the side entrance that was much quieter. 

Lance pulled him all the way through the school to the courtyard where there were a bunch of tables. Kids were playing card games like Pokémon and Club Penguin, some older kids were selling chocolates for their different sports teams, both sitting and standing on tables to do so which was against the school rules. 

Keith wanted to be like those kids when he was older. He wanted to have the freedom to do whatever he wanted without the fear of getting in trouble. 

Lance didn’t let go of Keith’s wrist as he stopped walking to take a seat at a table that already had two other kids at it. He pulled Keith onto the bench next to him finally letting go. Keith rubbed his wrist awkwardly while Lance simply smiled at the other two kids. They both held confused expressions as they stared down the unexpected guest. 

Keith recognised them from soccer. Katie was a very small girl, even smaller than Keith. Then there was Hunk, Keith didn’t know if that was his real name or if he had another one. But Keith just assumed they called him Hunk because he was bigger than everyone else. He was a really good goalkeeper, and Katie played on the wings, but just like Lance, Keith had never spoken to either of them. 

“Hello Keith.” Hunk smiled brightly, losing his confusion instantly, seemingly just accepting what was happening. Katie on the other hand just stared at him silently. 

“Hi-”   
“Your brother is at my house. He didn’t go to school today.” Katie interrupted his shy introduction bluntly. Her words really shot his nerves and he couldn't even muster up a response to it. Keith could only stare back worriedly at her deadpan expression. 

“Pidge.” Lance loosed crossly at her.   
“Keith is out new friend, say hi.”  
“Hi.” She said. “Your brother is sad a lot-”  
“PIDGE!” Lance drew out her name. Katie, or as everyone called her, Pidge shut her mouth, squinting at Keith for a moment.   
“Do you believe in aliens?” she asked, crossing her arms. 

Keith definitely did, and the thought that maybe she did too made him really excited. But Keith didn’t want to be wrong again so he just shrugged.   
“Yes or no?” She pressed pointedly.   
“Uh, yes.” Keith remained quiet and very intimidated by the tiny girl.  
“Okay, cool. We are friends now.”

Keith felt the lump in his throat go down and let out a sigh of relief. It was at this moment that Keith almost jumped out of his skin at the feeling of hot breath on the side of his face. It was lance about to whisper in his ear.  
“She’s the scary one.”  
“I HEARD THAT!”

~after school~

Lance, Rachel, Katie, Hunk and Keith walked to the front of the school t where the parents picked up their kids. Keith decided to wait with the others until Marco picked them all up, then he’d walk home. He found out that the others played this game where they guessed when it was his car coming over the hill into the pick up zone. 

Keith didn’t join in at first but his competitive side took over as he looked for the boy’s Mazda 3. Determined and sure that he’d won every time a small car came over the hill. 

Katie ended up winning when, as a joke, called that it was Marco when a navy minivan pulled over the hill. However Marco was in fact, driving said said car belonging to Mrs McClain but was never driven by the high schooler. 

“Hey Kiddies! In you get” Marco called, winding down his window as he pulled up to the curb. Rachel quickly called shotgun which made Lance whine. 

“Why are you in this car Marco? You don’t like this one.” Hunk called as he climbed in.  
“Needed more space since we are taking Keith too now.” he answered casually. 

“I’m what?” Keith said as the four other children turned to look at him.   
“Yeah, Mrs Holt said that you are friends with Lance and were invited to go. Come on, in you get.”

Keith looked to the floor, moving slowly towards the car. He only looked up when he got a sharp elbow to the ribs by Lance.  
“Told you we were friends. It’s going to be so much fun!” Lance was back to shouting before he turned to the rest of the group. “I CALL SITTING IN THE BACK WITH KEITH!”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> here i thought it would be easiest to give a run down of everyone's (or most people's ages). This story is broken up ultimately into 3 sections of time, so I'll update this as I go. It makes it easier for everyone to keep up.
> 
> Keith: 8  
Lance:7 (almost 8, stay tuned)  
hunk: 8  
Katie: 8  
Rachel: 10  
Takashi (Shiro, also stayed tuned): 12  
Matt: 12  
Adam: 12  
Veronica: 12  
Luis: 14  
Marco: 16 (it's just easier for my brain when all the the McClain's are evenly spaced okay.)
> 
> Krolia, Colleen and Rosa went to high school together and are about 36. Rosa had her forst child at 20 (Marco) and both Krolia and Colleen were 24 (Takashi and Matt)
> 
> No one else really matters, not yet at least. 
> 
> Please let me know what you think of the story so far! I really love to hear your feedback!
> 
> if you want to read on the entire completed story (with all it's inglorious yet numerous spelling errors) is on my Instagram @paladin.teddy
> 
> why not chuck us a follow anyway? I post little drabbles there now xx


	3. Arc 1.3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> the end of Arc 1, please let me know what you think so far. Arc 2 begins after a time skip to 13 or 14 years old. thank you so much for reading. if you want to read the OG un edited but complete version of this you can on my Instagram @paladin.teddy <3 <3

Keith sat with his new friends every day at lunch time. They sat in the shade of a big oak tree and the raven thoroughly enjoyed that it was out of the way of everything else. They could play whatever and do whatever without drawing the attention of anyone else. 

However, class time was a whole other story. The trio had always sat at the front of the room, right in the centre. Hunk and Katie sat in the front row near the teacher while Lance sat in the seat behind Katie, often moving his desk slightly so that he was in the space between them. There was room beside Katie but Lance wanted to be able to talk to both of his friends; as well as the people behind him and everybody else. Sometimes Lance was given the ‘pleasure of sitting right next to the teacher at her desk when he was being too loud. 

Keith had heard teachers say that it was all for attention, but Keith thought that Lance just liked being friends with everyone. Every day the four of them would enter the class and Lance, Hunk and Katie would take their seats, encouraging Keith to sit down with them. Keith would awkwardly linger there, worrying that he was taking up too much time to decide before opting to go sit in his back corner seat near the window. 

He’d join them one day. 

Months went by and the four got closer and closer. Keith especially enjoyed the days where they went to Katie’s house. He got to see his own brother which was good. Every single visit he’d ask when his older brother would be coming home and every time Takashi would reply with ‘soon’ while giving him his signature warm smile that made Keith really want to believe that his words were genuine. 

Going to Katie’s also meant that Keith got to meet Matthew Holt: The funniest kid on the entire face of the Earth. He was Takashi’s best friend and he made a lot of bizarre references that Keith hardly ever got, but always made everyone else laugh, especially the adults and he and Takashi’s friends. When they asked him to defeat a really hard boss for them in a video game, he wouldn’t just do it, he’d actually teach them how as well. Matt also called Katie ‘Pidge’ which she hated but it made Keith laugh.

But as fun as Matt and Katie were, and as fun as Takashi and Hunk were; nothing and no one could ever beat how much fun Keith had with Lance. The brunette lived close enough that Keith could walk to his house and see him everyday after school. They would go to the forest and explore or go to the soccer field and practice. Sometimes they would have to stop because Keith got angry, but Lance would always just tell him that it was okay that he missed because he was still amazing. He’d tell him that he would get whatever goal or trick or drill right next time.

Lance was really good at calming Keith down.

Lance was almost eight and he was very good at soccer. He was always watching YouTube and learning new things to show at training. Their coaches never thought much of it and told Lance to just follow the drill like everybody else, but Keith thought it was amazing. 

If Lance tried something new during goal practice that caused him to miss, the tyrants would tell him to stop mucking around and to get to the back of the line. Keith noticed that they compared Lance to his older brother a lot; they compared Keith to Takashi a lot too, but in different ways. They said Keith was like his brother, they said things that were similar about them. They never stopped pulling apart every tiny different aspect of Lance and Luis. 

Keith even heard them compare Lance to Keith a few times. Keith wished they wouldn’t. He hated being the reason that the spark faded from Lance’s eye. He always felt so guilty when he had a turn after Lance and the ball went straight between the posts. Sometimes he would miss on purpose, but the never scolded him, they often let him go again. 

The part that made Keith the saddest is that their coaches were never quiet about anything. So even though Keith was quiet and would actively try and listen in on what they were saying, he knew that Lance heard all of it too. 

Keith knew that lance didn’t feel as though he was good enough for them. He tried to prove himself relentlessly but his coaches always dismissed it as attention seeking. Keith didn’t think that. He thought his new friend was brilliant. 

Keith always felt guilty. He tried to hang back but people always pushed him forward. People said he had social issues but lance always told him that people never gave him the chance to speak for himself to encourage his confidence to do so. Keith really liked that Lance cared what he had to say.

Keith and lance understood each other. That is why when Keith gave Lance one of his famous friendship bracelets he made a matching one for himself too. They were both red and blue because they were their favourite colours. One spelled out ‘best’ in white cube beads and the other spelled out ‘friends’. On each end there was another bead, one saying ‘K’ and the other saying ‘L’. It was the first gift Keith had ever been given by a friend and he was going to keep it forever. 

Soon enough, the last sprinkles of snow fell off of the leaves in the forest. Keith and Lance’s friendship blossomed in time with the flowers in Spring. The season came and went as did the beanies, scarves and hoodies followed, much to Keith’s dismay. 

Summer was coming on strong; the days felt hotter than they had ever been - as hot as it could get in Minnesota. Keith loved the cold; he loved warm drinks, short days, soft blankets. He loved movie nights and snow fights. Summer meant folding all of his favourite clothes into boxes under his bed. It meant that his jet black hair heated up really quick, making him sweat. It meant that he had to beg Sendak to take him to buy new swimming clothes. But the one thing that made Summer worth saying goodbye to all of his favourite things was the fact that was going to be his most favourite person’s 8th birthday. 

Lance went on and on every lunchtime about the pool party he’d be having.he showed Keith after school the shark rash shirt that his mother had bought him to protect him from the sun because the day of the party was supposed to be one of the hottest days of the year. Keith showed Lance the plain black one he had because Sendak said the one with the hippo on it was stupid.

Sendak was in charge of bringing home the latest Pokémon game on DS for Lance. Pokémon Heartgold and Pokémon Soulsilver had released in the September of the year before. Lance had assumed that Santa would bring them but deciding not to share his list with his parents before sending it off the North Pole proved not the best idea for the boy.

Since the release date, the prices had gone down significantly so Sendak was asked by Krolia to purchase both games for Keith’s friend. After deciding that one game was enough, a sad Keith wrapped the one game in a sheet of A4 paper that he’d decorated himself with markers. 

Keith made his way down the street with Krolia to the party. She was to drop him off and Keith would be staying the night with the McClain’s. As soon as they were in the door, Keith was tackled to the ground by his very excited best friend. 

“KEEF LOOK!” The cuban spoke with a very prominent lisp.

Keith looked to his friends wide smile to see a large gap where his two front teeth were missing.  
“I finally lost some baby teef!” He shouted, poking at the gum where his adult teeth had visibly begun to grow through. 

“Well, that’s what you get for running down hardwood stairs in socks, Lancey.” His mother spoke sternly ut endearingly. Lance pouted before smiling back at his friend.  
“It’s so cool Keef!” The boys voice echoed at its volume.  
“Haha, you speak funny.” Keith giggled from the floor, where Lance had only just let him go.  
“Keeeeeeef!” Lance whined.

Krolia id farewell to Keith, stating that she’d picked up an extra shift at work this weekend when she was asked to stay and chat with the other mums. 

Keith and Lance ran to the backyard where about a dozen other children were already playing. Sendak had made Keith go late because he’d deemed the child’s room ‘not good enough’ and had made Keith clean it again before going. Keith thought it was unfair but knew better than to say anything of it. He really didn’t have enough things in his room for it to get messy. 

Keith stopped to put the small gift he was holding on the table with all of the others. He made sure to put it right at the front so everyone could see the drawing he did on the paper. 

The two boys went straight for the large collapsible pool where Hunk and Katie were already playing.  
“Hi Hunk, hi Pidge.” Keith smiled happily at them, very excited to be at his first party. Since knowing Matt, the others had taken to calling Katie ‘Pidge’ as well. She was so short compared to all of the boys, the name was even picked up at soccer. The coaches thought it was funny how it fit her small yet angry, fast and aggressive nature when on the field. 

The four children played in the water for ages. When it came time for lunch Katie, Lance and Hunk got out of the pool. Keith stayed behind, enjoying the cool water running through his grown out hair. Keith was too busy pretending to be a hippo, sticking only his eyes out of the water as he swam around; poking his nose out only when he needed to breathe. 

He was having such a good time that he barely noticed his friends departure. It was only when he felt a large object hit him right on the head, causing him to get up and turn around , vicious glare on his face, that he noticed he was alone in the pool.

Instead another boy from his class was standing at the edge of the pool, the soccer ball he’d collected out of the water still dripping wet. The boy stared at him with a smug smile on his face. 

“Ha! Keith doesn’t have any friends! He has to play alone!” he yelled, turning the attention of two cousins that had just moved to Minnesota from Europe, Allura and Romelle. 

“No!” Keith whined, “They went to get food!” Keith balled his hands into fists, cheeks red with embarrassment. 

“You’re so weird, Keith!” The kid continued, the two girls peering on silently. “You don't talk or sit with people in class. You have to have timeouts at soccer because you suck!” He continued to make jabs at Keith. 

“Stop it!” Keith yelled, getting out of the pool. He could feel the angry feeling rise in his chest. He wanted to push it down. He didn’t want to ruin Lance’s birthday. He couldn’t. The thought of doing that only made it harder to control the angry feeling. 

The boy continued. 

You wear the same red jumper every day. That’s so weird, Keith. You’re weird. You never go on school excursions that we have to pay for. I go on all of them because my mummy and daddy are rich-”

“STOP IT!” Keith screeched, eyes scrunched shut. The small boy snapped, launching forward at the other. Keith tackled the brunette to the floor, the soccer ball rolling away. The two boys wrestled, hitting and kicking each other wherever they got the chance. This caused more kids to notice the commotion and Allura and Romelle to run away screaming, alerting the adults. 

“KEITH!” JAMES!” STOP RIGHT THIS INSTANT!” Mrs McClain yelled. She and another mother stormed over to the two boys. Mrs McClain pulled Keith off of James while the other woman picked James up in her arms. 

Keith was placed back on the ground. Heat rose in his cheeks as he noticed the disappointment on her face. He glanced at the people surrounding them, spotting lance instantly. Mouth open, toothless gap on show, silent. Keith frowned and looked back to Mrs McClain. 

“I’m going to call your stepdad, Keith, since your mama is at work.”

Upon hearing those words, fear instilled in Keith and he burst into tears.  
“I’m sorry, Please don’t! No! I’m sorry, James started it! I didn’t mean it!” Keith put on a big show, fear very evident in is meltdown. 

This shocked Mrs McClain tremendously. She had never seen the sweet and polite boy act like this. She worried that it had something to do with the mention of Sendak. Mrs McClain took Keith’s hand and shushed him gently. 

“Keith, calm down baby. It’s okay.” She rubbed circles into his back as he continued to sob. She lead Keith inside and wrapped him in a towel before sitting him on a chair. She stared at him worriedly as he thought of what to do. He didn’t fight her, he didn’t struggle or anything. It was like the child froze, sobbing hysterically however going willingly. 

She watched him hiccup as he calmed himself down, eyes shut. She walked away to get a band aid for Keith, who’d scraped his knee in the incident.

While she was gone Keith sat still by himself, frowning as he pondered what was about to happen. He’d done it. He had made everyone stop and look. He had made Lance sad. He had wrecked Lance’s party. 

Keith hugged the towel around himself as he continued to breathe slowly. 

“Keef?” He heard a small voice from beside him. Keith jumped, looking up to see a sheepish looking Lance. “Are you okay?” The boy asked.

Keith couldn’t speak. He tried to keep everything in, but his chest was busting to let out a sob. Lance saw tears well in Keith’s eyes and he flung himself forward to envelop his friend into a hug. 

“It’s okay. What’s wrong? Are you hurt?” Lance pulled away to look at Keith who shook his head. 

“I wr-wrecked your party.” He stammered through tears. 

“No you didn’t. James started it.” Lance told him.

“They don’t believe me. I tried to tell them.” Keith cried, referring to the adults. 

“I believe you.” Lance said, putting an arm around his friend. 

The friends shared a smile that was interrupted by Lance’s mum setting the packaging for the bandaid she had just opened on the seat next to her. 

“Can I do it!” Lance asked excitedly, holding out his hand for the SpongeBob bandaid.  
“Sure thing, birthday boy.” She said, handing it out to her son. 

Lance sat on the ground in front of Keith, concentrating really hard as he carefully placed the bandaid over the graze on Keith’s knee. Keith watched idly, appreciating lance’s work when it was finished.

Lance smiled at Keith, standing up again. Keith got up from the chair he was on just as there was a knock at the door. Keith instantly snapped his head over to Mrs McClain, the same fearful expression as before taking over his face once more. She bent down to be eye level with Keith, a gentle hand on his back.

“I’m sorry Keith, I had to call him. I want you to tell him what happened and then you are welcome to join the party again.”

Keith hung his head as the woman walked away to answer the door. Lance pulled on Keith’s wrist, drawing his attention.  
“Quick we can hide in my room.” The brunette suggested. Keith stared at him for a moment, expressionless, before shaking his head solemnly. His breathing then picked up, realising the weight of the situation, Keith lost the ability to speak.

“Keith?” he heard Mrs McClain call. The two boys crept slowly to the door, Lance in close tow to Keith. Lance had never met Keith’s stepdad, but on the rare occasion that they played at Keith’s house, Keith always made him leave as the man got home. 

Whenever Hunk and Pidge asked if they could come over to Keith’s house for that week’s Friday Night play date, Keith always said he was busy and that he couldn’t go no matter where it was held. Lance had the suspicion that he wasn’t busy, that he just didn't want people to meet his stepdad, and that on those nights Keith just stayed home. 

Lance waited in anticipation as they got to the front door to see who the man was. Keith had said a few times, just to Lance, that his step dad was really mean. Lance was very apprehensive to meet him.

A very large man stepped through the door, Keith instantly shrunk back into Lance. He was ready for Sendak to yell and scream about him fighting but instead he simply shook Mrs McClain’s hand gently as he greeted her warmly. 

“Hello. Rosa, correct? I’m Sendak, Keith’s dad.” His voice was soft as he stood tall, making Keith very confused and uncomfortable. Mostly, Keith couldn’t shake the way Sendak had claimed to be his dad. The words sent shivers down his spine. Sendak turned to Keith, a fake worried look on his face, it was very weird to see his eyes so passive, his stature relaxed and gentle. He went to place a hand on Keith’s shoulder but the boy instantly flinched away, earning a concerned look from Rosa.

“Keith… Now is it true, what I’ve been told? You’ve been fighting now have you?”

Keith took a few steps back. He wanted to shake his head and run away. He could feel his throat closing up and his vision blur. But the promise that he could go back to the party allowed him to stand his ground. 

“With the Griffin boy, James.” Explained Mrs McClain. Sendak turned to Keith with a shocked expression.  
“That nice boy from the soccer team you verse sometimes? Keith…” He tutted disappointedly, making Keith’s skin crawl. He didn’t know what Sendak was doing but it terrified him.

“If you say it’s okay, Keith can return to the party.” Mrs McClain said to him.  
“Oh no.” Sendak looked to Keith. “I can’t have you fighting. No, I think you need to go home and think about your actions. Your mother and I have raised you better than this. Hopefully this will be a lesson to you about starting fights with innocent people, and next time you will be able to behave yourself.”

Keith was dumbfounded.  
“No… no, pl-please.” He tried to speak however it only came out as a whisper.  
“Good day, Rosa.” He looked apologetically towards Mrs McClain while gently leading Keith out of the house. Keith looked back at Lance in desperation, the livid expression on his best friend’s face was enough to break his heart. 

As soon as they were out of the house and the door had been closed behind them, Sendak’s entire demeanour changed.  
“What the fuck is wrong with you, kid.” He spat before whacking Keith on the back of his head. “Come on, move!” He yelled, gripping Keith’s upper arm aggressively, pulling him towards their house. “I had to miss 10 whole minutes of the big game because of you.” 

Keith was in tears as he was shoved down the hallway.  
“Now you can go to bed without dinner!” He roared as he pushed Keith into his room and slammed the door. Keith sank to the floor, now he’d really done it. 

***

Rosa was shocked. She shut the front door and turned around, placing her back against it. Keith was always such a polite and sweet boy. Yes he may have some anger issues, he may need a cool down sometimes, but she never thought he could or would go that far. 

The other part of this that deeply confused her was Sendak. For the time that Keith and Lance had been friends she’d been working on a theory. She’d always seen Sendak around the neighbourhood, he looked mean spirited and selfish. He’d kicked his girlfriend’s son out of the house at only twelve years old for being gay. 

Then there was also the way that Krolia had shrunk as a person. She used to be such a large presence in the community. She had Ken had been in their circle of friends growing up, they were high school sweethearts and prom king and queen. They were social and in community associations. Now it was even rare for her to watch her own son’s play soccer. 

On top of all that, the look of sheer terror in Keith’s eyes when she had brought up his name; rosa was so close to being sure that Sendak was a truly horrible person, and that he was abusing the Kogane’s.

But now…

Now she thought perhaps she had misjudged the man. He was a gentleman when he had taken Keith home. He was caring towards the young boy. It was very true that Keith had developed some issues after losing his father so young, less than two years earlier. Perhaps he was acting scared due to his fear of Sendak replacing his father. Perhaps Sendak was a very traditional man, strict to the church. Perhaps Krolia was just preoccupied these days. She and Ken had been doing well for themselves before he died, perhaps she needed to work more to support her family now. She did say when dropping Keith off that she had picked up more shifts during weekends…

There were explanations for everything, Rosa didn’t want to make assumptions she couldn’t prove. 

The woman looked down to where her youngest son was still standing, looking at the floor sadly.

“Mijo, why don't you join the party again.” Lance didn’t say anything, instead he let out a small sniffle. Rosa leaned over to be eye level with her son.

“Lance, I’m sorry Keith had to go home, but you can see him another time, okay.” Rosa pondered her words. Did she want Lance to see Keith again? He’d been a wonderful guest when he came over, and she didn't think he had ever shown any sort of aggression towards Lance. 

She just worried that he would become a bad influence on her son. That if he fought other children, maybe when school went back, Lance would get caught up in it too. She wasn’t in the mood to make her son stop his friendship with Keith on his birthday however, and decided to see what came of this spectacle instead. 

Lance was still yet to meet her eyes.  
“Keith lied to me, Mama.” He mumbled.  
“About what?” This concerned Rosa. What had Keith been saying that she wasn’t aware of.  
“He said that Sendak was mean to him, but Sendak wasn’t mean to him then.” Lance had a deep frown on his face that broke Rosa’s heart. His statement also complicated the web of theories surrounding the Kogane’s. She found it impossible to make a decision on them just yet. 

It was simply fact that children lie sometimes. This fear could be apart of the walls Keith had built surrounding Sendak joining his family, but she had grown to care for the boy and didn’t want to discount his words so quickly. 

“Anything else?” She asked Lance.  
“I don’t know anymore!” Lance cried. “How do I know he hasn’t lied about everything! You know he told me that James started the fight by calling him weird and I believed him! Now I don’t know.” Lance started to sob at his friend’s supposed breach of his trust, snot running down his face. Rosa pulled Lance into a cuddle, his damp swimmers making her shirt slightly wet. 

“Hey, Mijo, shh.” She comforted. “We don’t know that.” She pulled away to look at him. “Here is what we can do, we can talk to Keith’s mama, okay. We can find out.” Lance nodded. “Now I want you to go back outside and enjoy your party. We still have that big shark cake for you. You don't want to miss that do you?”

Rosa smiled. She knew her son would not be able to resist it and in an instant he was smiling back. He wiped his snot on his arm.  
“Okay, Mama.” He continued to nod and smile as he ran back to the party outside.

Once he was gone, Rosa went into the kitchen. She leant against the island, staring at the place where she’d written down Krolia’s phone number on the fridge. She would get to the bottom of this. Either for her son’s sake or for the sake of the Kogane’s. She would find out. 

Once night fell, Hunk, Katie and Lance were tucked up in bed and Colleen and Rosa had finished cleaning up from the party, Rosa told her friend about her idea.

“Are you sure we should be meddling? She was out friend once, you know. She could tell us if anything was wrong.” Colleen said warily. 

“Come on, Col. Takashi is living at your house for goodness sake. Even is it is just because he is homophobic, what good hearted person throws out a twelve year old?” Rosa argued. 

“I guess…” Colleen sighed, “Poor thing, he still won’t answer our questions. It is as if he is afraid to throw anyone under the bus. All he will say is that he isn’t allowed to live at home.” 

Colleen was silent for a moment. Having convinced herself through her own words, she agreed to help Rosa with the Kogane’s. The two women agreed that this could go really well, or prove to be a very bad idea, none the less they called Krolia and asked if she wanted to help them with the soccer bake day. They said that the kids were all out that day at training and they would love to see her again. Over the phone they reminisce about the cakes Krolia had made when she was still on the committee. Rosa mentioned the orange and poppy seed recipe she’d given to her daughter, Veronica, which to this day is still her favourite. Krolia was reluctant but eventually agreed to join them at Colleen’s house that coming Thursday.

It was as if the days dragged for the women, waiting for Thursday to finally happen. But soon enough, Krolia was standing in the Holt’s kitchen, ingredients in hand. The three women quickly got to work. Colleen made pie, Rosa made her famously light and fluffy frosting while Krolia started the chocolate cupcake batter. Colleen and Rosa chatted happily, trying desperately to include their old friend and make her feel welcome. Krolia was awkward, attempting to contribute to any of the gossip being shared, pretending that she had kept up with the people being talked about. She realised that she had desperately missed the company of the two women. 

“So, Lee.” Rosa used her old nickname for Krolia. “How’s the new man?” She smiled innocently.  
“Oh, well you know.” She began nervously, trying to sound nonchalant. “We both work a lot but we have really good conversations. He’s travelled to a lot of interesting places.” She lied through the biggest fake smile. 

“Yeah, I get that. Sam is always in the lab, but he will spontaneously bring home flowers and it just makes my day.” Colleen harped. 

“Oh, you know what.” Rosa smiled at Krolia. “I took it off before the party and never got it back out of the jewellery box, but my hubby bought me the most gorgeous necklace for our anniversary.” She beamed. “What about you?” She asked.

“Yeah, you two have been together for two years, you’re essentially still in the honeymoon phase.” Colleen added.” Krolia looked between the two women cautiously, attempting to find a way to make her reality sound normal.

“Oh, you know, we keep it low key.” She began dismissively. “It’s easier for everyone adjusting to having a new person in the house, especially for the boys’ for, for Keith.” Krolia corrected herself. She bit her lip nervously, looking to Colleen hopefully. “...Thank you,” she whispered, her voice wavering as she thought of her eldest son.

“Honey,” Colleen stopped what she was doing and walked over to Krolia, taking her hand. “Takashi is so welcome here.” She soothed circles into her friend’s knuckles.

“Krolia let out a defeated sigh.  
“It’s just that…” ‘think of something’ she told herself. “Sendak won’t have him in the house…”

“Is he religious, is that why?” Rosa blurted before halting, cringing at her bluntness. 

“Uhh, yeah actually. Very religious. He isn’t at all open to Takashi’s situation. Sendak won’t have him dating that boy, what’s his name, Adam.” Krolia spoke casually as if what she was saying was coming from a whole truth. “To be honest, he is only twelve, I don’t really want him dating anyone. I know it’s not a phase and I am fully prepared to support him, I really want to. If he gets to say, 15 and wants to date boys he can do as he likes. He is just so young.” Krolia stopped as she realised she was rambling. “But it doesn’t matter what I think, Sendak is just so… Traditional.” She put emphasis on the last part, placing the spatula she was using back in the bowl.

Rosa pressed her lips together, giving her a sad expression.  
“Lee, you might love him, but you have to think about your babies first.” She said. Krolia tried not to react outwardly at the sentiment that she might actually love Sendak at all. If only her old friends knew think in some twisted fucked up way, keeping him around was thinking about them. She was left with nothing, he was the one paying for their education, she could only manage to keep the lights on and the warm water running. As much as Krolia hated it, she needed Sendak.

“Yeah, I know… I’ve been trying to talk to him.” She said to the women, leaving out the sardonic part of her conscious that added, ‘only, everything I’ve tried has left me with a new bruise’.

“Mum, that smells amazing, what are you cooking?” Matts voice suddenly echoed through the hall from the lounge to the kitchen. Krolia froze. She thought Colleen had said the kids weren't home. Suddenly it dawned on her that she had meant that only the younger ones were at training. 

“It’s for the club, not you.” She sang back sweetly yet sternly. Just as she finished speaking, the person that Krolia had been dying to see for weeks entered through to the kitchen, following behind Matt. It was like the wind had been knocked out of Krolia’s chest as she locked eyes with Takashi.

“Kash.” She whispered.  
“Mum?” he sounded shocked. Krolia ran to her son, pulling him into the tightest hug. “Mum, is it true?” He stood back to look her in the eyes. “You’re gonna convince him to let me come home?” Their mutual stare was an intense one. They could read exactly what the other was thinking in that moment without words. They were the only ones who knew exactly what the task of ‘trying’ really entailed. Krolia inhaled a deep assured breath.

“I’m going to try.”

Krolia popped her cupcakes into the oven, cleaning the utensils she had used and went to talk with Takashi. Once they were alone, Rosa turned to Colleen. 

“I’m still just not sure.” She blurted quickly.

“About what.” Colleen queried, she wondered what side of the theory Rosa was leaning towards.

“Anything. All of it. She says things that make him sound like a good person. When we spoke, he seemed like a good person. But the rest… it just doesn’t add up.” Rosa sighed, dropping the tea towel she was holding back onto the bench in front of her. 

“I just want to help her, I want her to be our friend again, how it used to be.” Colleen frowned. 

Rosa was lost for what to do. She didn’t want to give up on the chance that Krolia was struggling and couldn’t or wouldn’t say anything. But for now he could only trust her gut. She would let Lance be friends with Keith and she would always watch over the Kogane’s best she could through that. She would try desperately to not overstep or invade, even if that meant simply inviting Keith into their home every day until she found peace in their truth.

***

Lance sat in the unkempt grass of Keith’s backyard, legs spread out in front of him, the overgrown weeds making his legs itch, though he said nothing of it. Keith sat opposite him, together they silently rolled a soccer ball between them. The Summer had grown even hotter as August rolled in. They originally had gone to kick a ball around on the oval but it was far too hot.

But the boys needed something to do. Anything.

Mrs McClain had sent Lance over to play with Keith since he had refused to talk to his friend since the party. When school went back after summer, Keith would continue sitting by himself in class, however lunchtime would also return to a similar routine. Keith would go back to his old spot around the side of the school under an old forgotten tree, alike the one Lance and his friends sat under however, untrimmed, wayward and overgrown. It’s long branches did however would shield his small figure from the sight of others.

But for now, here Keith was, staring down his ex best friend. Keith didn’t really know what he’d done to upset Lance, but he knew he wasn’t welcome. The expression on Lance’s face when he'd been escorted out of the party alone made Keith want to cry. The frown he’d put on his friends face was permanently etched into his brain. 

So they sat and pushed a ball between them, waiting for night when they could ignore each other as they had done before they were friends. Or at least how Keith had done.

Eventually the silence grew cumbersome, the tension was growing and it felt as though it was about to all come crashing down. 

“Why do you hate me, Lancey?” Keith simply whispered, not making eye contact. He looked down so that his long fringe covered his face. 

Lance sighed.  
“You lied to me.”

“I didn’t,” Keith said defensively yet honestly. “I didn’t start the fight!” Keith looked directly into Lance’s eyes at this, attempting to telepathically prove to his friend his innocence. 

“You said your step dad was mean. He isn’t. How do I know you haven’t lied about everything? Is your name even Keef?” Lance spat, in the most literal sense as his lisp was still prominent through his growing in teeth. Lance stopped pushing the ball and crossed his arms.

“Yes! It is, and I’m telling the truth. James was calling me names and Sendak is mean. He pushed Takashi, he yells at everything, he won’t let my brother come home. He is not my step dad and HE NEVER WILL BE!” Keith cried, standing up in his anger. 

Right as Keith finished speaking, tears rolling down his cheeks, a loud bang could be heard from inside. The fright of the noise only made Keith cry harder, thinking that Sendak had heard what he had said.

Both boys looked towards the back door where loud yelling erupted. With a quick glance to each other they both made their way cautiously to the door. Lance hesitated before Keith grabbed his hand and pulled him through into the house.

Keith knew he probably shouldn’t in fear that lance would get caught up in all of this. But it was only for a second, only to prove to Lance that he could trust him. Keith wiped his face free of tears, looking up only in time to see Sendak shove Takashi into the wall in the hallway. 

“I’m here to talk to Mum, not you!” The boy yelled, wrestling the much larger man to get into the house.

“And I told you that no fucking fags are allowed in my house! Get out and never come back! Sendak spat at the child. 

“Where is Mum!” Takashi demanded.”

“She doesn’t want to see you, she hates you!” The man roared. Takashi was livid.

“I saw her last week, I know that isn’t true! Where is she!” Takashi was now struggling to hold his ground, digging his worn converse into the floorboards as Sendak went about pushing him out of the house. He put up a good fight but was far too small. In no time, Takashi found himself back on the front porch, door slammed in his face.

Keith and Lance were stunned silent, eyes wide and perfectly still. Sendak turned away from the door, fists in tight balls as anger surged through him upon noticing the boys’ presence. 

“What are you doing here? Go!” He shouted and the boys had no trouble obliging. They ran into the backyard, Keith yanking himself free from Lance. They ran out of the back gate of the house and down the line of fences until they were in the safety of the McClain’s back yard. 

Lance dramatically threw his hands around Keith, digging his head into the crook of Keith’s neck. 

“I’m so sorry I didn’t believe you. We can- we can tell Mama.” Lance hiccuped, desperate for his friends forgiveness. 

“No, we can’t. Lance we can’t say anything.” Keith said very seriously. 

“Why not? He’s a bad man, they can send him away.” Lance argued. 

“We just can’t okay.” Keith grabbed Lance’s shoulders so he could look him dead in the eye. 

“Okay,” Lance whispered. “I’ll never doubt you again, Keef, ever.” Lance said, smiling and pulling Keith into a hug which he returned gratefully. 

“Best friends?” Lance asked.

“Best friends.” Keith agreed. 

The two boys walked into the McClain’s house, meeting Rosa in the kitchen.  
“Friends again?” She asked, unknowing to what they just witnessed. The pair just nodded back at her. Suddenly a grin took over Lance’s face

“Can Keef sleep over, Mama? His clothes are still in my room from when he was gonna sleep over last time.” Lance asked hurriedly, hoping to get his friend away from the horrible man at least for one night. 

“If Keith’s mum is okay with it. I’ll call her when her shift is over. When is that again Keith?” She turned to the boy, concern veered in her expression as she noticed the hint of fear in his face. More so when she noticed it in Lance’s as well. ‘What had they been up to?’ She wondered. 

There were still just so many loose ends in her web but for the moment she was just delighted that the boys were friends again.

“She is usually home at seven, ma’am.” Keith answered. He was still only warming up to the McClain’s and was not yet entirely comfortable talking to the adult directly. 

“No worries,” she smiled warmly, that did a little in calming Keith’s nerves. “You two just get cleaned up, you’ve both got dirt on your clothes.”

Keith and Lance got quickly cleaned and into pyjamas, sitting up in bed to play the game that Keith had got Lance for his birthday. They were fine taking turns to battle Pokémon and trainers on the DS, they’d never had a problem sharing. It was more fun with a friend anyway. After confirmation from Krolia, the boys ate dinner and went to bed. 

They cuddled close to each other as they had always done. It had been silent for a while when Lance put his arms around Keith and whispered to him.

“Are you okay?” it was silent for a moment after, before Keith answered. 

“Yeah, I’m used to it.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sometimes I worry that you guys don't get everything that the Insta readers got. Each chapter is made up of 6 Instagram posts, and usually in the description of each I would put in a little thing about why everything was happening and kinda explain why there reaction is the way it is. i know good writing should be able to do that without explanation and I would love to let the writing speak for it's self. I just wonder, ya know. 
> 
> at least you guys get better spelling/grammar and a more in depth story as I am not limited to the margins of Instagram slide limits.
> 
> Instagram: @paladin.teddy  
Tumblr: @palain-teddy  
twitter: @paladin_tracob
> 
> Thank you all so much for reading, catch you later
> 
> teddy xx


	4. Arc 2.1

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> New Arc! 
> 
> Keith and Lance are in middle school, Keith being 14 and Lance about to turn 14, lance is insecure about his shortcomings, especially with how close they are to entering high school. Through their teens, the pair become even closer as friends, bonding in new ways every day.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hello! sorry about the wait, my HSC exams are almost over!!
> 
> For a shittier, non edited version of this with less things added into it, follow my Instagram: @paladin.teddy where i also post drabbles. this kind of counts for Keith's birthday post, as the actual one I wrote fro his birthday isn't done yet Thank you all so much for reading. <3 <3

Lance, Keith, Hunk and Pidge as well as most of their classmates had been sent to the middle school in their hometown of Plymouth, in Minneapolis, Minnesota. All of the elementary schools in the area filtered into the massive establishment which had the most terrifying concept to Keith, but most exciting to his best friend Lance. 

Lance on the other hand, was delighted to meet so many new people; everyone from his elementary school was like his family and the brunette had started to get interested in the illustrious dating scene that came with being fourteen. Now in eighth grade, he’d befriended most of the grade, but what Lance was really keen for was a girlfriend. 

This adamant desire of Lance’s deeply affected the growing insecurity in the back of Keith’s brain. He wanted Lance to be happy, but he was very worried about losing his best friend to some girl. Keith had had no interest in dating as of yet, which he found weird considering it was quickly becoming all Lance would talk about. For a while Keith worried that something was wrong with him but had eventually concluded that dating just wasn’t something that he would care about for some time. Maybe in high school.

Fortunately for Keith, however to much of Lance’s dismay, the Cuban had not been able to land a single girlfriend in their entire middle school experience. Not even a one-day-one-kiss-hold-hands-eat-lunch-and-break-up kind of thing. 

Keith had at least been forced to kiss both Acxa and Allura at a point during some inevitable game of ‘Spin the Bottle: Truth or Dare’ that Lance had pressured him to join. But as much as Lance had participated, he’d never been picked for a kiss. 

Keith often thought about the two kisses he had with girls; mainly when Lance was so insistent about bringing them up and how lucky Keith was. He just didn’t really enjoy them, not even a little. Keith just assumed that it was because of the awkward situation that they had been under. Still, his thoughts often betrayed him. 

Late at night Keith frequently found himself wondering about why his body had told him that everything about what had happened was wrong. Deprived of sleep, his mind would wander down the path of his sexuality, but he was always quick to catch himself and snap out of it.

Keith already knew he was not gay, after all. Not that there was anything bad about it. His brother, Takashi was gay, and he loved his brother - and Adam, his boyfriend who he had been with all through middle school and high school. 

Keith was actually really happy that Takashi has Adam in his life. Eventually after many, many fights, Krolia had convinced Sendak to let Takashi live at home again. The man treated him like he didn’t exist, so it was good that Takashi did have some sort of escape. 

Sendak’s treatment of the teen was insanely cruel. On the very rare nights that Sendak cooked for the family, he would always be one plate short. Krolia would give her plate to her eldest and find dinner for herself, and after about five instances, Krolia had cooked every night since. Keith suspected that the only reason Sendak offered to cook was to torment Takashi. 

Keith had no idea why his mother had kept Sendak around for so long. When he was little he actually thought for quite a while that she really loved the foul oaf. As he got older, however, he was made terribly aware of the loveless partnership they had embarked on. He knew that money was tight originally, and that Sendak paid for a lot of their necessities. But over time, Krolia had worked and gained promotion after promotion and these days Sendak lived in their house for free. Keith wondered if it was simply because they had been together for seven years already, but as much as he tried he just didn't understand why his mother couldn’t just kick him out. 

Keith had resulted in spending most nights at his friends’ house. Rosa was like a third parent to him at this point. Both of Lance’s parents treated him like one of their own and Keith was so grateful to them.

Every time Krolia was working late into the night and Sendak decided to drink too much, too fast, and reduced to throwing his empty bottles at the boy, he would be welcomed into the safe haven a few doors down. 

He tried desperately not to make a habit of this, attempting to deal with most of his problems on his own, calming the feeling of suffocating in his throat that was essentially ever-present. He would retreat to hiding in his room and then cleaning up the mess once the damage was done and Sendak was passed out - all before his other returned home, as to allow her some peace.

But nights when it just got to be too much. He’d stay with Lance. His best friend would tend to any cuts, scrapes or bruises that Keith had accumulated from his oppressor and help him to hide them from the rest of Lance’s family upon the older boy’s request. Then they would play video games together until they both fell asleep. Keith always found that the nights he was cuddling with Lance he had the least difficulty falling asleep. 

He wondered if they were too old to cuddle at this point, he was learning all about relationships and knew that it was a romantic thing to do; but Keith knew he wasn’t gay. Neither was Lance. It was just something they had done since they were kids. It was just what best friends did, he supposed. Best friends and couples. 

Lance had gotten a new double bed a few years back when his parents revamped his bedroom for his birthday. He’d kept the space theme, stars firmly remaining on the roof. However he had switched his basic rocket, martian and astronaut posters for some more advanced ones. He had also hung a decent sized periodic table on his wardrobe door. He and Hunk had developed a deep love for historical space exploration whereas both Keith and Pidge were determined to prove the existence of aliens and Mothman even if it killed them.

The young teens had been back to school for about two months after Christmas break when Takashi had turned eighteen. The event resulting in Keith having stayed at the McClain’s for about a week at this point. The fight between the new adult and Sendak had been brutal, with the ageing man aggressively telling him to find his own place to live if he wanted to continue his lifestyle. He took his chance when Krolia had gone on a few night business trip. 

Takashi did have a job, so did Adam; they worked at the local cinema where they were both managers, but they had no means to pay for a place to live, they were in college to think about and they had social lives. Keith thought that at that age they should be allowed to simply focus on being young. 

After things got violent, Keith couldn’t take it anymore, he had talked with Takashi who agreed with him, and helped him to leave. Gone to the place that felt more like a home to him than the cold, dim, prison cell of a house had felt since his father had died and Sendak had come into their lives. 

Keith was grateful that he and his brother were able to remain so close. Takashi would even show him cool hole-in-the-wall style places where him and his friends went and Keith was introduced to the best people. 

These people, college kids and working adults alike were open minded and free spirited, quite like how Keith had remembered his mother when he was around five. These young adults managed to enjoy life, and Keith was able to enjoy it too for a brief window. Something Keith only thought possible for rich families like the McClain’s, or the Holt’s or the Altea’s. But these people were just like Keith and Takashi, They loved and were loved.

But now that Takahsi was out of home, forced to put all his savings into dorm living, and Keith was at Lance’s house everyday, he had no idea what it meant for their relationship. Would they even get to see each other?

Keith just knew that high school would be better. He didn’t really know why as he hated the idea of more people, but it did mean the potential for adding more people like Takashi’s friend’s to their small group. More people that weren’t rich or from good homes, like the rest of his friends, but people like him that were somehow still happy and made him feel as if everything would be okay for him. But for the time being, he had Lance. He would always have Lance. Lance might not understand everything going on in his life or in his head, but his best friend was always there for him nonetheless. 

***

Lance helped his mama cut up fruit after school. His house was so close to the soccer field that his teammates would often come over to hang out before training. He supposed Keith’s house was just as close to where they trained, but he never had people over. Lance had sort of known about his best friend’s situation for years, though the older boy had made him promise to never say anything. This really confused Lance as Keith wouldn’t have to live with Sendak who Lance knew to be a truly horrible person. But a promise was a promise and Lance was a man of his word. 

Lance loved afternoons like this. It was Springtime and the season had just begun. It was warming up and he could just get lost in the sound of birds and the wind in the trees outside through the open patio door. He was entirely relaxed as he mindlessly sliced oranges and strawberries, arranging them on a platter where his mama had also put some bananas, watermelons and apples.

Lance hummed happily as he looked to the clock hanging on the wall; Keith would be over in about half an hour. At this point, their weekly routine was ingrained into them like second nature. Practiced and repeated. Keith would always come over before anyone else and they would eat, play video games and practice some new tricks outside with the soccer ball. Then James, Ryan, Nadia, Ina, Katie and Hunk would be over and they would go down to the field. 

James had joined their team recently, after they had won three consecutive grand finals against his old team. Lance didn’t mind, James was a skilled player and improved the team by filling in the gaps in offence. 

But Keith, who had had a strained relationship with the kid since elementary school, absolutely hated it. Not only was James now on their team, but he played the exact same position as Keith. Keith and James would have to take turns during games which always went one of two ways. Keith was gracious, like when he played DS or Xbox with Lance. But if he was in the zone, pumped full of adrenaline like he was at most points during a game, he was ruthless. He’d get mad, kick things. 

So for Keith, it was either go through that as a right forward, or learn to play left. So that is exactly what Keith did. Keith had learnt not only how to control the ball equally well with both feet, but had been placed as the centre forward and quickly became the team’s captain. 

Sometimes Lance wondered if Keith ever knew how to stop. Lance had always wanted to be team captain, but he was glad that his best friend was able to enjoy it, and use it as a distraction and something to focus on with everything else going on in his life. 

Lance was centre back; the heart and soul of the defence as he saw it. If it were up to him, Hunk wouldn’t have to touch the ball once during a game. He was a talented goalkeeper and Lance had nothing but faith in the kid, even if he was scared of the ball sometimes. 

But Lance needed that. He needed to be the best at something. The strikers got all the glory from the crowd, but nothing filled Lance with more pride than when he knew he had done his best in a game. It would be nice to have someone else, especially the coaches, notice his efforts, but being proud of himself just had enough. 

Lance put down his knife when he heard a knock at the back door. Keith stood their shyly, bruised knees visible as Keith was already in his soccer clothes, knocking on the glass even though the door was already open.

“No need to knock in your own home, Keith.” Lance’s dad joked as he picked up the finished fruit platter, placing it on the table outside. He covered it with a cloth before going back inside to clean up the kitchen with his wife. Lance’s dad had recently upgraded his entire business as they had become significantly more profitable. This meant that he could be home all the time, even if most of that time was spent in his office. Keith thought about how good it would be if his own mother was able to be home more. 

Keith had only really gotten to know Mr McClain after the company shift. Before that, he would come home too late to everyone already asleep, but now Keith was able to hear all the wisecracks and jokes about himself being there more than at his own home. Keith really liked the man. He was so lighthearted and happy to be around his family. 

Keith let the strap of his soccer bag fall off his shoulder, dropping it carelessly to the floor outside as he and Lance took a seat, ready to eat. 

“So, if everyone is here at four, we have two hours until practice. How far into the woods do you reckon we could get?” Lance asked, munching on an apple slice. 

“Quite far,” Keith said after a short contemplation, “Maybe the home tree. Not the wormhole, though. I don’t want them going there.” Keith said firmly. 

“Fair enough. That’s ours anyway.” Lance agreed casually.

Lance and Keith often lead soccer team expeditions into the woods. Home tree was a massive oak tree where the roots were big enough to use as chairs. It was ‘home’ during games of ‘44 homes’ when they had time to play before practice. But the wormhole was a spot that only Keith and Lance had been brave enough to venture into. It was a wide lake, very deep into the woods and the furthest they had even been. 

Mainly because the lake was impossible to get past. The trees eventually stopped at a clearing where the rocks dropped about six feet to where the water was black and seemingly bottomless. They found it during the winter a few years ago when it was frozen. They had thrown small rocks at it to break the ice. They decided never to swim in it, who knew what was lurking beneath the void-like surface. 

“Home tree sounds good.” Keith bit into a slice of watermelon. 

The taste of fresh fruit and the gentle breeze of the afternoon ghosting his skin reminded him of every movie where the perfect people lived out their perfect little lives. Nothing could go wrong as he sat in easy silence with his friend, watching the light goosebumps that rose on his arms when the wind dusted over his skinny arms, causing the hairs to stand. 

The rest of the kids arrived soon after, polishing off the entire platter of fruit in a matter of minutes. No harmony or serenity, let alone silence remained for Keith as the hungry athletes devoured the snack. Goodbye peaceful afternoon. 

Keith found it hard to admit, but he actually really liked his team. They were wild chaotic, loud - usually the kind of people that Keith stayed away from. To be fair, Keith usually stayed away from everyone. But they were also carefree, accepting, funny and weird. They all had favourite things that they would force everyone else to learn about. Keith could listen to people talk about their favourite things for hours. 

The liveliness was good for Keith, he thought, a good contrast to his own life. It was honestly, most likely the reason Keith gravitated to Lance so much. Though he wasn’t chaotic to a James or, god forbid, a Pidge level; he was actually quite laid back despite everything going on in his head that he thought Keith couldn’t pick up on. 

The group exited the back gate of the McClain’s yard and began following the fence line down to the woods. 

“Ugh, do we have to go in there today?” James complained from the back of the pack. 

“What’s wrong with the woods?” Keith crossed his arms defensively. He couldn’t help it, the place meant a lot to him. 

“It’s boring.” James drew out his words, Ryan and Ina nodded in agreement. Keith was about to retaliate when Hunk butted in. 

“It’s okay, we can just go up to the clubhouse, we can play truth or dare or something.” He suggested quickly, raising outstretched arms and lowering them to signal for everyone to calm down. Hunk was always the one to ease the tension and Keith really appreciated how many times he had stopped a classic Keith blow-up.

“Yeah! Now that sounds fun!” Nadia chipped in.

The group of eight made their way across the several soccer fields and up the hill to the where the clubhouse was. It was a simple small brick building where all the equipment was stored as well as the bathrooms and canteen that was only opened on weekends during game time. Through the rest of the week the building was closed. 

They sat down on the asphalt basketball court behind the clubhouse, forming a circle. Keith sat close to Lance who leaned forward with silent anticipation. 

“Okay, I’ll start.” James announced loudly to the group. 

***

Keith slumped back down on the concrete, cradling his grazed knee. He’d successfully climbed the clubhouse wall, upon receiving the dare from Ryan. He had quickly and nimbly scaled the jagged bricks, however getting down proved to be a significantly harder challenge. 

He dusted away some shards of gravel that were still on his knee, wiping off some of the blood from the graze as well. He had stopped paying attention to the game at hand as his focus was pulled to asses the damage. It didn’t look bad, though it stung. He had some bandaids in his bag back at the McClain’s, he could fix it later.

Keith was pulled out of his concentrations suddenly by a loud eruption of laughter and loud taunting. The raven looked up to see that the attention of the group was on a nervous Lance. His tan cheeks ever so slightly revealed a pink blush as he held his fits tight, jaw clenched as he breathed in heavily. 

Keith had no idea of the question the brunette had been asked but Lance looked really uncomfortable and it made him instantly feel bad. 

“I have too!” He cried out, eyes shut tight as Keith released the words were directed at James. 

“Have not or you wouldn't have hesitated.” James retorted smugly. 

“What?” Keith asked confused, back-pedalling as the group stopped to direct their attention to Keith. Hindsight kicked in as he realised that the tone of his voice made it sound as though he was making fun of Lance and whatever question he had failed to answer in disbelief; impossible as he did not even know what the question was.

James held his hand out to Keith, rolling his eyes.

“Keith would know, obviously. He’s Lance’s best friend.” Keith gulped as all eyes were still on him, a particular pair of ocean blue eyes pleading for him to answer a question in which he was still none the wiser. 

“Tell us.” James said casually. “Has Lance kissed anyone.” 

“Uhh…” his eyes lingered on James before they shifted over to Lance. Keith knew the truth, and was undoubtedly willing to lie for his best friend. But something in his stomach twisted his will. The fear of the group questioning him further, and him making them both out to be liars. In the heat of the moment, Keith sought to save his own skin.

“I… don’t know.” Keith mumbled. 

“Well have you?” James’ accusing glare returned to Lance.

“Just answer the question Lance, it isn’t really a big deal.” Pidge tilted her head to the side. Keith hung his head, he knew that to Lance, it was a big deal, and something he was very insecure about. He could see the way Lance’s breaths quickened while the group pressured him, unaware of the impact it was having on him. 

The look in Lance’s eyes and his body language resonated deeply with Keith. It hid a feeling that Keith was all too well acquainted with. Every time Sendak hit a wall or threw something at him, every time he threatened his mother or brother with violence, Keith took on that feeling as well. He was about to step up and tell everyone to back off when a yell from an almost crying Lance silenced the hounding group. 

“NO! I haven’t!” His teeth were clenched as tears pricked at his eyes. Keith knew that his friend’s reaction was more out of embarrassment than anger towards the others. 

Nadia went to respond but a loud whistle cut her off. The group looked down at the field to see the rest of their team as well as their coach already huddled and waiting to start practice. The eight of them got up and began to hurry down to meet the rest of the team, studs clattering against concrete until they reached the grassy hill. 

At the bottom of the hill Lance slowed to a quick walk, enough to fall behind the rest of the group. Upon noticing this, Keith slowed down too, falling in line with him a small distance behind everyone else. 

Keith could tell that Lance was still upset and decided to try something that always made him feel better. He reached towards his friend to take his hand.

“Hey Lance-”

“What are you doing?” Lance jerked his hand upwards at the contact however Keith managed to keep his grip, intertwining their fingers. 

“Making sure you’re okay, dummy. I’m just doing what my mum always does when I get like this.” He spoke calmly. At his words, Lance relaxed into the gesture, smiling at his friend. 

“Oh, okay.” He replied, unfazed. They continued to walk, hand in hand.

“But really, “Keith spoke after a moment, “I saw your face back when they were bugging you, it looked like how when I get when I am frustrated or angry. It's like I can’t control the situation and it all gets overwhelming. It isn’t fun.” he explained. Keith squeezed Lance’s hand to show that his support was there. Lance smiled. 

“Yeah, I guess I just didn’t want them to know. I thought they would think less of me.” Lance brought his free hand up to rub the back of his neck, ashamed. 

“Why would they think less of you? Heaps of people our age haven’t kissed anyone, even Katie. And she said it wasn’t a big deal.” Keith attempted to comfort, soothingly rubbing circles into Lance’s hand with his thumb as they walked. 

“But it is to me, you know that, Keith.” Keith nodded understandingly before looking up to smirk at Lance.

“If it helps, in my professional opinion, kissing isn’t that great.” Keith joked, Lance rolled his eyes though some of the tension had evidently lifted from the air. 

“Whatever. Katie isn’t exactly the one I’m worried about. You saw James’ reaction.” Lance sighed.

“Who cared about James?” Keith cocked a brow. “I don’t even know why you are friends with him.” Keith said exasperated, quiet enough that he assumed their conversation was out of earshot of anyone else. 

“Well he is on our team. I know you guys have some bad blood, but he isn't all that horrible. He is a very good player and he tries hard.” Lance argued the case for a side that he wasn’t even sure he was on. Keith huffed. 

“But I’m your best friend. He may be a good player, but he is taking my spot on the team, don’t you care about that more?” Keith argued back, hand still tightly gripped in Lance’s. At that point both teens had forgotten that they were even doing it still. 

***

James walked with his head down, frowning as he tried to make it seem like he wasn’t eavesdropping. He didn’t mean to, it was just hard not to when you hear your name come up in a conversation. He turned around to look at them, sending them an accusing glare. As he faced the best friend’s his eyes were instantly drawn to their clasped hands. James watched Lance notice his gaze, instantly freezing and freeing his hand from Keith’s, who, unaware, looked at him confused. 

James felt bad, Lance probably thought he was looking at them weird for holding hands. He didn’t care, really. They were very close after all. And it wasn’t like they were gay, Keith had kissed girls before, James had seen it. More importantly, James pushed down the immense hurt he felt in his chest as he walked on. He didn’t want them or anyone else to know that he had heard the horrible things they had been saying about him. He had no idea that that was how Keith felt about him.

When joining the team, the thought that he was taking a position from someone else never even crossed his mind. He was just there to play the best he could and hopefully make the state team in the next few years. 

When he was handed the spot of right forward, he assumed it was free as Keith played left forwards so well that he assumed it was natural and practiced. Not to mention that Keith had developed into a stunning centre forward that year, well enough to be chosen as captain. James was actually really excited to be playing alongside such a talented player. 

He knew that in the past he had been a little mean to the kid, but he didn’t think that what he had done was so bad that it carried on to now. He certainly hadn’t done anything recently beyond small jokes. In all honesty, his pranks and taunts may seem a little harsh at times, but it was never intentional and he never thought that Keith would take offence to them. 

He respected Keith as a player and friend and knew that if they worked together in games and in training they would both find their way to state for sure. 

***

Just after seven o’clock the coach blew the whistle and the two teams involved in the practice match stopped running. They gathered in groups, stripping off the different coloured bibs they were wearing, for post practice feedback. These were Lance’s favourite training sessions, when there was either a slightly older or younger team training at the same time as them, even better was the tea ma division below them. 

Lance and Hunk were the last to meet their group as they were running over from the opposite end of the field. Lance caught his breath as the coach commended the wingers for their side-line attacks. Lance rested his hands on his knees, exhausted from the game yet filled with anticipation, eager to hear what feedback his coach had for him. He had felt bad after the game of truth or dare, but bounced back quickly as soon as the game started, once he was in control of the situation again, as Keith had put it. Lance always felt better after talking to Keith. 

He played better than he had all season, blocking so many of the oppositions opportunities to try for a goal. He felt as though he was getting so much better at strategising and having the other two defenders listen to his ideas. 

He almost felt like a mimi captain as he observed the other team’s plays and told his fellow defenders where to go. He couldn’t wait to see what his coach had to say about his hard work.

After what felt like an eternity the coach turned in his direction, Lance could swear the coach was looking right at him as he began to talk. He felt his heart swell as the coach went into specific appraisals. 

“You were all on the ball tonight. No gaps between you…” He scanned over the three defenders. “Oh, and Ryan, excellent catching that forward's trick going down the side, I really thought they would get through but you did some excellent work. All of you need to be watching how Ryan plays if you want a shot at the state team when the scouts start to come to the games.” He looked to his clipboard before flipping the page.

Lance felt his heart deflate, Ryan looked to him apologetically, knowing that it was Lance that had picked up on the attack and had warned him. Lance told himself that it was fine, there was no way for the coaches to hear him from the sideline and he was sure the coach had something for him too. Lance hoped deep down that Ryan would say something about the play, that it was Lance’s work, and not his, but he knew better than to believe he would. 

“Great work out their Romelle,” The coach turned to the team's newest defender, “I can see you working hard on your fear of the ball. You were really getting in those boy’s faces, Keep it up.” The man paused for a moment, reading over his notes… It had to be Lance’s turn.

“And that is about all I noticed. Rest up and I will see you on Saturday at the Grand Final.”

The coach turned and walked over to the unpacked equipment, clearly intent on getting home as quick as possible. The rest of the team dispersed, leaving Lance alone, frozen still.

Nothing. The coach had seen nothing that he did. Lance’s hands trembled as he scratched his arm mindlessly. He bit his bottom lip as his throat constricted slightly. He pushed down the lump of emotion as he fought the urge to cry. He was better than that, but still. He tried so hard yet no one saw him.

No coach saw his ability, no girl saw his potential. In that moment, Lance felt as though he had nothing.

“Lance..” The brunette thought he heard someone call his name, however he was too lost in his own misery to digest it.

“Lance?” He jumped when he felt a hand slide into his own. 

“Keith!” He replied, startled. “Sorry, just scared me.” He tried to laugh it off, although Keith didn’t look amused. 

“You okay? Everyone else has packed up.” Lance gazed down to see where Keith had taken his hand and quickly clasped them together properly. Keith looked at the gesture with a small smile. Lance felt an ounce of reassurance return, he was happy that it was something they did now, Lance simply felt a little less hopeless. 

“Yeah,” Lance sighed, “I’m okay. I’ll just go pack up so we can, uh, leave… yeah.” He staggered out letting go of Keith’s hands and jogging over to his bag. He threw off his studs, socks and shin pads, stuffing them all into his bag with his water bottle. Standing up, Lance slug the bag over his shoulder and ran to catch up with Keith again as the two of them made their way to the McClain’s. 

Keith was staying the night like he usually did after practice. The following night, Friday Pizza was being hosted at the Holt’s. 

After years of tradition, Keith could recall a grand total of two nights that Keith had been allowed to have friends over. One of these nights happened when they were ten and Sendak was on a business trip. Krolia spared no expense for the Kogane’s first time hosting the weekly get together. They were allowed to order off the gourmet pizza menu and they built a fort. Krolia even bought Keith a new game to play on the Xbox. Keith never told anyone but Lance, but it was actually the only Xbox game he would come to own. The Xbox was actually Sendak’s and he never let Keith use it. It was for watching football and old reruns of M*A*S*H* and other shows Keith found boring. 

The other was when there was a club representative night at soccer and all of Keith’s friends parents had to go. Again, Keith would never tell anyone but Lance, but his mother and Sendak had been fighting for days about it, Krolia arguing how often Keith is taken in by everyone else and Sendak shoving her aside at ever mention of the idea. Sendak went out to a pub that night with his friends and refused to help, Keith heard his mother and brother agree that it was for the best anyway. 

Lance thought back to all the times he’d seen Sendak, fortunate enough to have never really experienced much of him directly. But as he got older he really noticed the impact the ogre of a man had of Keith and his family. Keith always begged him not to tell anyone, and Lance always kept the promise he made to his best friend. He knew it would be better to tell someone, that it would most likely help Keith, but a promise is a promise. 

Warmth instantly filled both boys as the pair sat down once inside, dinner already set out and and a lively conversation already commenced. Lance felt lucky on nights like this when he didn’t feel like talking, as there was always enough people with things to say that his lack of enthusiasm could go unnoticed. Even Keith had become a frequent contributor to conversation, comfortably joining in and joking with the rest of the family. 

Lance loved that about his family, his brothers who had already moved off to college may be in their twenties, Veronica might be eighteen and Rachel may be sixteen, but his and Keith’s opinions were respected and accepted equally to everyone else. 

Lance rested with an easy smile on his face as he watched Keith wolf down his mama’s cooking, letting the cold and bitter feeling left with him after training air out as he enjoyed the vibrant chaos that was his busy household. Sometimes he was sad that he didn’t get praise, he sometimes found himself getting jealous of the praise that Keith got. But Lance would see his family and that feeling would melt away. Deep down he knew that Keith probably needed those appraisals more than he did, especially having to go home to people like Sendak most nights. 

Lance assumed, as this was the case most nights, that as soon as the conversation turned political he would be free to make it to the end of the night without being questioned for his mood. And he almost got there.

However, when Keith Kogane was in the house, and just so happens to be your best friend, getting away with things became considerably harder. 

***

Half an hour later Lance was rubbing his eyes, forcing them to stay open a little longer as he crawled into bed. He shuffled over to the side of the bed that was closest to the wall so that Keith could get in easily when he was done brushing his teeth. 

The events of the day all came crashing down on him as his head hit the pillow, completely exhausting him. All lance wanted to do in that moment was was sleep and then get through the next day. He rolled over to face the wall and let his eyes fall shut. The only sound that filled the otherwise silent room was his own breathing, listening to the calm pattern as his brain continued to thwart slumber. 

In the still darkness, Lance heard the door click open, light footsteps patter on the carpet before he feels the other side of the mattress dip as Keith climbed into his spot on the bed. 

“Lancey?” He whispered. Lance debated not rolling over, pretending he was already asleep, but Keith’s voice held an urgency that he just couldn’t ignore. Lance hesitated before obliging, he really didn't have the energy to put up with Keith’s stubbornness anyway. 

“Yeah?” He answered quietly. The brunette looked for his friend through the darkness. Keith was sitting on the edge of the bed, knees tucked underneath him as he faced his friend. 

“Are you okay? You were just really quiet tonight.” Lance grimaced, he knew Keith would do this.

“Oh, yeah. Just tired.” He tried to put on a casual tone as he spoke.

“You and I know that is bullshit Lance.” Keith deadpanned, dropping his hands on the bed forcefully. After Lance failed to respond he pushed again. “Come on Lance, cut the crap.” 

Lance bit his lip, unsure of whether or not to speak. If he stared, he knew he wouldn’t be able to stop. He hated that about himself. 

“Lance, what’s up.” Keith rested a hand on the brunette’s side gently, his tone pulled back and softer than before. Lance sighed, leaning across the bed to turn on the desk lamp. Keith’s worried face was illuminated.

“I just… I’m just feeling like no one wants me.” Lance sat up in bed, looking down at his hands as his blanket fell down around his waist. Keith’s mouth fell open silently, Lance breathed out heavily at Keith’s furrowed eyebrows and apologetic expression. 

“Lance, that’s not true. You have so many friends, and your family-”

Lance cut Keith’s words off with a sharp grunt. He pressed his hands to his face as he figured out how to articulate what he wanted to say.

“I mean the coaches. They’ve never liked me, even when I was little and, and-” Lance stumble don his words, reluctant to admit to Keith why he was really upset. It was stupid and he knew Keith wouldn’t understand. The coaches loved him and he had already kissed girls. He hated to be selfish and knew he was being unfair but it just seemed like Keith was getting everything Lance wanted and didn’t even want it. 

“Lancey?” Keith made to grab Keith’s hand, however when Lance flinched away, he retracted. 

“I just constantly get the feeling that I’m not good enough for anyone, not he coaches… not any girl.” Keith opened his mouth as if he was about to speak, Lances pointed expression deterred him. “You know I haven’t kissed anyone. No one wants to… I was keeping it to myself, but- but then James…”

Keith narrowed his eyes at Lance. “You know I’m going to be the first person to tell you not to listen to James.”

“It’s not that.” Lance dismissed him. “What happened today, just got me thinking. I’m almost fourteen and I’ve never experienced anything and I-”

“Lance.” Keith reached for his hand before Lance could pull away. “Heaps of people haven’t. It really isn’t a big deal.” Keith’s eyes widened at Lance’s incredulous reaction, he ripped his hands away angrily. Keith realised his mistake. 

“Well it is to me!” The Cuban yelled.

“Hey, hey, It’s okay.” Keith remained calm, pressing a soothing hand to Lance’s back. “I’m sorry. I should have known it meant a lot to you. In fact, I know it how much it does.”

Lance waved off his apology. “No, it’s not your fault. I just don’t want to feel inadequate, like I’ve done nothing that meant anything to anyone else.” Keith pressed his lips into a thin line as Lance closed his eyes. How could he even begin to express how many of Lance's actions meant the world to him. His kindness and generosity, the countless time Lance gave to him when he needed it. But he knew that that wasn’t the kind of thing Lance meant. 

“You don’t need that,” Keith tried. “You have the high scores on all the Mario Kart tracks, and you never ever forget to feed Mrs Balmera’s turtles when she visits her granddaughter in Nevada.” he said lightly, half as a joke and have meaningfully. This sentiment earned him a pillow to the face as Lance held back his laughter. 

“Keeeeef!” Lance whined like he used to when he was little. “ I’m being serious, idiot. Something cool.” he smiled. Keith raised his eyebrows mockingly. 

“Oh, because kissing girls is SO cool and you are just SO cool to, huh.” He taunted sarcastically. 

“Yes!” Lance claimed matter of factly. Keith just shrugged. 

“I don’t think it’s that cool.” He shrugged more casually before a wicked grin took over his face. “And I know all about being cool.” he whacked Lance with the pillow, who ripped it out of Keith’s grasp with a yell. 

“Oh, really? Then why have you done it? Twice!” Lance’s shoulders slumped, the shift in tone ending their banter. Lance fiddled with the pillow case as Keith rolled his eyes; he really didn't like how his friend was comparing them. 

“They were dares, Lance. It’s different.” he said.   
“Yeah whatever. I can’t even get a girl to kiss me on a dare.” Lance said, defeated. The two boys fell silent at that, lance dropped the pillow back onto the bed. Keith held his breath as a thought came into his head. He didn’t know if it was a good idea, or how Lance would react if he propositioned it. He just wanted to help in anyway he could.

“You know…” Keith said, looking down at the bed so that his long fringe hung over his face. “I fit really means that much to you…” Keith felt his cheeks redden, he didn’t know why he felt embarrassed so suddenly. “I could.”

“What? Kiss me?” Lance questioned. Keith couldn't tell if Lance was angry or repulsed from the tone of his voice. He looked up just to be met with Lance’s equally expressionless face.

“Uh, yes.” Keith replied slowly. Lance didn’t look mad, exactly, just unsure as he stared at Keith with a worryingly blank expression. 

“Isn’t that - isn’t that weird? I me-mean. Like, we are friends, best friends.” Keith felt his stomach twist as Lance appeared to be making excuses. He felt his hands tremble as he searched for a way to make the situation less awkward, to put the air back into the room after he had sucked it out. 

“Well yeah. But we like cuddle and hold hands. It would just be like that. And it’s just so you can say you did it, anyway.” Keith shrugged dismissively. He just wanted to help his friend feel better, he never wanted to make him feel uncomfortable. 

“Um, yeah. And it doesn't have to mean anything.” Lance felt his hands clam at the concept of his first kiss. Admittedly not how he pictured it, but he wasn’t about to go and be picky about it. 

“Sure.” Keith said.

“And you are sure you want to?” Lance asked. Keith knew that he was being assuring in asking for consent, but it just made Keith feel like he had really messed up, like Lance was trying to back out. It was okay if he did, Keith thought, he just wanted them to stay friends. 

“Yeah, like people kiss when they love each other, right? Who says that can't be like the best friend sort of love?” He tried to make it better, Lance seemed to relax at that sentiment and Keith smiled, shifting forward on the bed towards the brunette. 

“Yeah, I think it can be. I love you as a best friend.” Lance said after a moment.

“Me too.” Keith said, moving properly to be right in front of Lance. Lance moved to sit up on his heels as well, the two boys facing each other, nervously lingering close to each other. Lance felt his cheeks heat up as the reality of the situation built in his mind. His first kiss was really about to happen. 

“I don’t know how!” Lance blurted all of a sudden, shamefully, a hand pushing Keith’s shoulder slightly. 

“It’s okay,” Keith said calmly, “I can show you,” Lance nodded, offering a sheepish smile. “Just uh, close your eyes.” Keith said, remembering the two kisses he had. Both girls had shut their eyes. Keith clenched his fists at the memory, as he had kept his eyes wide open the entire time, feeling far to foreign in the situation to enjoy it. 

Lance obliged, shutting his eyes comically tight and shifting his lips between puckering like a fish and furrowing his eyebrows as he relaxed them, as if he mentally scolded himself for being bad at this. Keith held in a chuckle, finding his friends action endearing. Keith breathed out, he’d never felt excited about kissing anyone.

Perhaps it was the fact that he was helping his friend, or perhaps that he was able to share something else special with him; something just for them. 

“I’m going to do it now, okay.” He whispered before tilting his head slightly and leaning in. 

Keith’s eyes naturally fluttered shit as he pressed his lips to Lance’s. He instantly noticed how soft the Cuban’s lips were, scolding himself as he fought back the thought, deciding that that was a really weird thing to think about you best friend. Keith counted to three in his head before pulling away. He opened his eyes as Lance did, returning the smile that was already spread across the younger teen’s face. 

“Well.” Was all he said.

“Well. Keith agreed. “I guess now you can say you did it. You kissed come girl from Colorado that is the daughter of some person that works with your uncle.” Keith replied quickly with a chuckle, dropping his hands to his sides from where they were resting on his knees. 

“Well…” Lance said again, a mischievous smirk playing at his mouth. He put his hands on his hips sarcastically. “If you want me to tell people, you better give me a story worth telling.” He teased. 

Keith thought for a moment about what he could do. He had seen Adam and Takashi kiss a certain way before, it looked fun and exciting and like the way the high schoolers did it in the movies. It seemed worth a shot. 

“Okay, close your eyes again then.” Lance did as he was told. Keith kissed Lance the way he had before, just to start off. “Now open your mouth a little.” he mumbled against Lance’s lips, smiling into the light pecks as Lance excitedly followed Keith’s instructions. 

Keith parted his lips too as he kissed Lance again. He pressed several open mouthed kisses to Lance who kissed back enthusiastically. He seemed to fully relax as he kissed back with a little more force, calming Keith down in the process. He tilted his head as Keith had done, guiding them back together each time. He felt his nerves drift away as the pulled apart a short fifteen seconds later, slightly breathless. 

“How was that?” Keith said, sitting back on his heels.

“Now, there is a story worth telling.” Lance chuckled. 

Keith laughed along with his best friend, the atmosphere returning to their usual lighthearted tone as they settled back into their spots in the bed. As they got under the covers once more, a deep tension cut and pulled away, Lance leaned over to wrap Keith in a tight embrace. Keith felt his heart rate pick up, well aware that his friend’s had too. They were silent as they enjoyed the hug, Keith able to feel every inch of his face heat up as his heart pounded against his ribcage.

There were butterflies tickling his stomach and he had no idea why. He just got that feeling sometimes when he was with Lance and they did stuff like cuddle, or like earlier that night when they had held hands. 

Keith pushed all of those silly feelings down, rolling his eyes at himself. He knew his brain must just be confused. He and Lance were really close, but they weren’t a couple. They didn't like each other like that. They were simply best friends and that was simply just what best friends did. 

“Thank you.” At the Cuban’s soft words, all of the inner conflict Keith had been facing fizzled away, out through his fingertips.

“That’s okay, Lance. Do you feel better now?” Keith asked over Lance’s shoulder.

“Yeah, Lance laughed. “Actually a lot.” His tone was light but Keith could still hear the exhaustion in his voice.

“Wanna go to sleep now?” He suggested. Keith turned off the light and they laid down facing each other in silence. Keith felt his eyes just start to droop when Lance spoke again, voice soft in the late night. 

“That was kind of fun actually.” He admitted.

“Kissing?”

“Yeah.”

“I guess it was pretty fun.” Keith agreed. He couldn’t shake the feeling of something lingering at the back of his mind, something he couldn’t quite reach or identify. She he pushed it away, distracted by Lance’s next request.

“Do you think we could, um...” Lance trailed off, looking up at the glow in the dark stars on the roof in order to avoid eye contact.

“...Do it again?” Keith attempted.

“Yeah, I mean if you want to. Like you said, we are best friends who love each other, so it’s okay.” he continued.

“Okay.” Keith whispered.

Keith rolled onto his side, meeting Lance’s eyes in the dark, illuminated by the dim moonlight outside of the window, shining into the room like a soft veil. His eyes were excited, or expectant maybe. Keith felt a lump in his throat, the kind of closing feel he got that told him that he wasn’t in control of the situation, and the ones that told him that Sendak would hurt him.

But Sendak couldn’t hurt him here. He was staying out of Sendak’s way actually, so by being here in Lance’s bed was the best thing he could have done. He was in a paradox, he determined. The bad feeling confused him, which in turn made him feel worse.

But for the first time that night, Lance was the one to lean forward and kiss Keith. Both boys shut their eyes, offering short and soft pecks as well as more of those longer open mouthed kisses that they had tried, giggling to each other in between. Keith felt the bad feelings float away like sand in the breeze when he was with Lance and finally he knew where he stood, assured in his actions.

Because this was Lance, his best friend. Whom he loved. And that was okay.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> thanks so much for reading!! let me know what you thought in the comments. 
> 
> My socials are  
Instagram: @paladin.teddy  
Tumblr: @paladin-teddy  
Twitter: @paladin.tracob


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